Untitled Absurdity

Friday, March 13th, 2020

Okay, here we go, my rambling wrath about things I couldn't say as three dimensional being, so I degraded myself as two dimensional being and braced myself and finally talk here....

For the freaking comedo sakes!!!!
Just what is wrong with that head of student's affairs department?!
I mean okay I feel grateful for your too open honesty, but really? Don't you learn about ethic? You are even a religion teacher!
So what is wrong when a parent complains about the day of departure for the school's program because it is on their family's worship day, and they must go to church....
Must you really complain that she doesn't appreciate your worship day because you sacrifice yours too?
I mean you yourself who decide to sacrifice yours, and they don't.

And I was in the room hearing all of your bullshits, you didn't even remember that I have the same religion with that family, and you just threw some shades like that....
This is why I don't understand adults....
If others throw some shades about you or things which have connections with you, you will offended easily, but you, on the other hand, unknowingly (hopefully) throwing shades about others too!!!!
How unfair!!!

I don't care the words "oh you cannot be an entitled person.... Even though you try your best to consider others' feelings and opinions, you cannot expect them to the same to you"
Those are bullshits....
I want to be a petty adults now!
And you, my head department... The existence of your pride and honor already ceased to none for me....

I am sorry, dear principal...
Your wish for me to mingle myself more with those single cell brain carriers won't happen....

Your wish for me to have whatsapp and join the so called family group won't happen...

I have no energy anymore to deal with this so called beautified filtered degenerative word called "family"
It is overused and misused to the point I question the true definition of that word.

I work to be paid.
I don't care with the family group or family environment...where everybody is like family members to each other....
Those are all mere bird poops all over the work place.

From my 6 years of experiences in work whether in freelancing, office, or field or even schools....
Nothing and no one really works as family....
Family is a word which abused to sugarcoating their half assed care and to manipulate others to do overwork for things which are not mentioned in the contract and somehow no matter how long I waited, I never got paid for those extra works.

I don't believe in "do extra miles" theory when it comes about fiscal/financial/money stuffs.

I have more respect for things which are stated clearly with clear borderline: "you got paid for what you work"
Fair enough...clear enough....
Being calculative...why not....

Many times I heard people say: just do your best, and somehow you are built for perfection....

Well, I am not that patience for that principal....
I need a clear guideline of things that I must do and cannot do....
Even God does the same.
Except when it comes about God's love...
I am sorry, I cannot do that.

The older I grow, the more I get convinced about the astrological and prophecy that I read about myself....
"I will get beaten by life 'till I become heartless"

And yes...
I need that....

I spent most of my life by wearing my heart close to my sleeves....
To the point my understanding, passion, love, patience are nothing for those single cell brain carriers.

I felt so betrayed by people.
Please God, do something so I won't give up on my humanity and faith.

Living in solitude sounds so fancy and luxurious.
But I must face the reality that my line of work makes me must face snotty growing social mongers and the slaves of self fabricated ideologies 5 days a week.

And they even expect me to have whatsapp so they could connect with me even outside the school (read: prison)?!
Don't joke with me, because it is not even a satyr joke.... It is not funny at all, to the point I can laugh off my flat ass over my none existence sense of humour.

Come on, people, don't you have life outside of work too?
I am sorry for no sorry...
I don't want to be bothered by your imbecility of comments and questions...
I, myself are not that clever... And all my wisdoms are fake....
I fake them so I could work...and manage the adult shits a.k.a feeding myself, and pay the bills.
So don't expect me to solve the problems or to participate in your rituals (read: gossip and friends) to call troubles.

I am not more holy than thou art person.
I am just a older-than-my-true-age person with very little patience and wisdom and tolerance and life force...
So I just don't want to be bothered.

Work is work
Home is home

As a true Libra-ian person deep in my turbulent dark vortex called soul... I wish for nobody to disturb the balance of my balance

Work is work
Home is home

I am more than exhausted....
I am drained if I must wear my high advance customized ultra fake face all the time...
I need sometime where I can laugh over the weary true face of mine by myself.

People can call me selfish, because I keep saying I...and I...and I...
I don't care...I have plenty of shits I must take care to sustain this over bearing life.
Indeed there is no I in team work, but there is me....

I am growing more irritated than before....
Maybe because I eat more chillies in my staple diet? (Uncoherrent corelation with today's case study, I know and I like it)

Owww and I feel bad for the ex-director who just got dethroned from the position...
I never know that from the beginning of my work interview until the evaluation for my next contract, she was the only one who stood for me against those hyenas who dislikes me and my originalities.....

Now I wonder who are the evil doers actually?
The famous ex-director....or these maggots who lack of creativity bubles in their brain factory who always mingle in the past...and boasting about how cool they are when they challenge their own leader publicly....
Well, the ex-director did the same though....

But still....
I feel I owe her my current job...
And it enlighten me that my deduction theory is right....
She is just lonely and too prideful to search carefully about her subordinates....
And with end results: a bunch of unnecessary shenanigans....
Wonderful....

What a wonderful school (read: prison)
I wish they would cut off the 'Christian' part from the school's name....
This school is just a religious school....no...a tradition school....
It is too heavy to put 'Christian' in the school's name....

I know I sound unfair to say this...
But sadly...
Most christians are not like Jesus Christ (including me)
Which is an irony because christian means Jesus Christ's followers

The ones who treat me well are the moslems, the buddists and other religion people....
There are very little few remnants who still try their best to behave and treat me in more humane way though...

And that's all for my rumbling crunchy thoughts of the day...
My fingers are already curly enough like noodles from the typing, because I used phone so...the hurdle increased....
And my eyes are melting too...
So talk again later, dear readers