Distrust//Kyle Kuzma

F O U R T Y E I G H T

A/N
Suggested songs for this chapter: I'll Never Love Again-Lady Gaga, You Are Not Alone-Michael Jackson

*February 20*

Kyle's POV

I sighed as I walked around the empty funeral home. Mili and Zo were the only people with me. It's been six days since I lost her. To say I've been lost would be an understatement. I played a basketball game the day after she went and it felt wrong. It hurt me to know that I'll never see her beautiful face sitting court-side with Mili again. I would no longer get to laugh at her dancing while I sat on the bench. I wouldn't be able to run up to her after we've won a game and kiss her. Part of me wants to think she's not actually gone but another part of me knows that she's gone. That night was such a blur for me, but I still heard every word she said. Three of them stayed with me though.

"I love you."

It was a relief to know how she actually felt, but those were her last words and that hurts like hell. Part of me is also numb. I've cried until I can't cry anymore. Another part of me is angry. I'm angry at myself, I'm angry at God, and people are making me angry. I wish I could've done more. Everyone keeps telling me that I did all I could, but I don't believe them. I'm angry that God took such a beautiful and kind hearted angel out of this world. I know it was his plan and it was her time, but I would give anything to have one more day with her. The press is also constantly on my back. I can't leave my house without being bombarded with questions. The news stations got a hold of the news about her death very quickly. Today, we're holding the funeral for Alivia. Yesterday we held the gathering of friends, but today is for the people that were the closest to her. Mili and I took the initiative on planning the funeral, even though I didn't want her to go through the pain of planning a funeral. We followed every request that was written in Alivia's "In My Funeral" letter.

"Hey, thanks for coming JaVale." I said as I shook hands with JaVale McGee.

"Thanks for the invite, brother. I'm sorry about your loss." I've heard that statement about 1000 times.

"Thanks." I nodded before I walked away.

People started to file into the funeral home. I smiled as I shook their hands and thanked them for coming. I smiled as my family walked up to me and hugged me.

"Hey, baby," My mothers sweet voice rung in my ears.

"Hey, momma," I replied as I hugged her.

"I'm sorry this happened to you, baby." She said as she smoothed out my suit jacket.

"Thank you momma." I sighed as I fixed the collar on my jacket.

"Is it true that your suit jacket is custom?" Dre asked making me chuckle.

"Dre, not even a "hello" or a "sorry for your loss" for your brother?" My mom scolded him.

"It's fine mom, and yes it is." I said as I unbuttoned the jacket to reveal the jacket liner. The liner was custom made with pictures of Alivia and I on it.

"That's very cute, son." Larry spoke up.

"Thanks, Larry." I smiled. "Guys feel free to walk around and find you a seat. I'm going to go greet some more people."

I fixed my jacket and hugged Briana before I walked away. I walked around and greeted some more people. I was walking around when I felt someone tap my shoulder.

"Hey, Magic," I greeted him as we bro hugged.

"Hey, Kuz, I'm sorry for you loss." He gave me a soft smile.