𝓦𝓱𝓮𝓷 𝓜𝓻𝓼. 𝓘𝓷𝓯𝓪𝓶𝓸𝓾𝓼 𝓜𝓮𝓽 𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓜𝓪𝓼𝓸𝓬𝓱𝓲𝓼𝓽...

Chapter 117

Carina stayed in the hospital for a few more days before she was able to go home. Each day our friends kept her company and did their best to help her remember, but I wasn't allowed to go near her without her lashing out at me. Delilah volunteered to drive her home to her apartment which she couldn't recognize but somehow she was able to remember her dog, Fern. Never in my life had I been more jealous of a dog. School was over for us and she was given a break from her job to help her recover, however long was needed. Each of us except for me took turns staying with Carina and helping her remember things that were meaningful and special to her. Most days she wasn't making any progress, but it seemed her hatred for me just kept getting stronger and it was so unbearable not being able to get close to her and remind her of why she loved me and I loved her. I was forced to continue loving her from a distance.

As much as my friends and my brothers tried to tell to have hope for Carina, I couldn't help but feel intense guilt for what's happened. If I hadn't walked out on Carina that night she revealed he shameful secret to me. How could I have been so selfish? She made a mistake, I know I have too. I guess I also made a mistake calling her perfect because maybe that made her uncomfortable since she believed she was anything but. She just seemed to have a more unique personality than most girls I've known, and at first, she didn't seem as screwed up as me. Of course, that wasn't true, she just had her own set of problems that made her feel imperfect. I guess her flaws were just attractive to me. Most people try to hide them hoping not to be judged for what they can't control, but they're just hiding a part of themselves that make them stand out and seem more human.

Something I've noticed is that Luis has been missing for a while and when I found him walking out of the printing store one day, I asked him, " Luis, where have you been? I haven't heard from you in a while." He looked down and then smiled as if he knew something exciting. Then he told me, "It's a surprise, Remington. I believe it will help Carina get her memories back. Can you please trust me?" I looked at him in both curiosity and apprehension, but Luis was one of my friends so I said, "Sure, Luis. I trust you. Just don't disappear so much, okay? I just miss you. that's all. Its been hard lately." He placed his hand on my shoulder and said, "Its okay, Remington, I understand. Thank you." With that, he smiled and walked away. I guess I just don't want everyone to leave me. Too many important people have already.

Delilah's POV

It's been almost three weeks since Carina had come back to her apartment which still felt foreign to her. It was so sad to see someone who looked like Carina struggling so hard to be someone she tries to remember and seems to feel guilty because she wants to remember, but can't. It was worse when Remington came close and she instantly drives him away with her hatred for him. I tried to tell her about how much Remington loves her and isn't what she thinks he is. But she doesn't believe us or probably doesn't want to if she remembers never wanting to fall in love before knowing him better. I asked her if she remembers her childhood, and she says she barely remembers her parents, who she recalls resent for being neglectful. I asked her if she remembers Justin from high school and she says she can't remember what happened, but she knows she got hurt because of him.

"What about us?", I then asked, "What about me and Nina and Emerson and Sebastian and everyone else you've met here who you've come to know and love and make a family out of?" At this point, it was too hard for me to take in the fact that she doesn't recall all the great times we had and that she's helped me to be a better person than I was. I felt like I had lost my best friend, but she was right here alive and healthy. I know she's only been here for a short time, but the way she's changed things here and make our lives better made it seem like she's been right here forever. "Why is it you can't even remember the one boy who loved you so much that he almost got himself killed trying to save your life? How can you just turn away from him now when you two are the kind of loving couple that only exists in stories? It is impossible to find what you guys have, and you're letting him suffer making him believe its his fault you became like this and he's starting to be sure you two will never be together again!"

With that, I stormed out of her apartment in anguish and hopelessness. I never meant to be so hurtful toward her, but I can't keep pretending I'm okay with it. It's so fucking hard to stay positive and hopeful when you've gone through something like this before. I almost lost my husband and was afraid I would never see him again. When he came back to me barely alive, it was like he came back from the dead and none of what happened was real. There was a time when I also hated Remington because I thought he was just an ass, but after he showed how much of a gentleman he actually was and how he had this protective sense around Carina, I knew he would be the one for her. Now I hate to see him torture himself believing it was his fault that he lost the heart of the girl he loves more than anything in the world.

OH DEAR!!! This is just so heartbreaking for me to write because I hate seeing my own characters hurt. How will this ever be resolved? Will Carina ever get her memory back? Or does she want to? Stay tuned as we continue to draw nearer to the conclusion of this story. I love you all so much!!! 💗💗💗