Tεrribly Pεrfεct

Chapter 21: The Missing Piece

"Sabina?" I spoke quietly into the receiver. She didn't respond for a moment, but I could hear her breathing on the other line.

"Mandie?" She answered, just as surprised as I was.

"Hey," I paused, looking around the room, "So I know this is kind of strange and coming out of nowhere...but I was just wondering if you'd seen Jesse lately."

I decided to keep it simple, even though inside I wanted to scream out and ask a million questions as to his whereabouts. Regardless of the fact that Sabina was supposedly my 'friend' I still didn't know the likelihood of her ever choosing me over Jesse. Asking her where or if she'd seen him, may end up being more difficult then I thought and immediately I regretted my decision to do this over the phone.

"Yes, why?"

I bit my lip, I had no idea what to say next. She didn't even offer to tell me where he was or how he's doing, did she want to keep it a secret from me?

"Oh, uhm...I was just wondering because I thought maybe I'd come and see him."

I let it out, I wasn't holding back anymore. Regardless, I was going to come off as a creepy-still lovesick-over-him girl and I knew there was nothing I could do about it.

So fuck it.

"I see...," She breathed, making my heart race, "I don't know if now's a good time. He's kind of uhm...occupied."

Wow. Of course. Why would he not have some other girl around him only a few days after me? Not surprised and frankly, it was just making me even more upset. How could he do that to me? I couldn't believe how soon he'd been able to move on, even if what we had was super short lived.

"Sabina, it's time for the draw. Lets go," I heard a voice in the background. I pressed the phone even harder to my ear, my brain working overtime just to process his command.

It wasn't Jesse, it had to have been one of his other members. I didn't recognize the voice, was it possibly the guy from the other night? The one who was talking in the room with Jesse?

"Nico, shut up. I'm on the phone," Sabina hissed. I jumped with the tone of her voice, suddenly scared by how aggressive she was all the sudden.

"Anyways, Mandie," She continued, "He's dealing with a lot right now, I don't know if it's a good time for you to come over. I just don't know how he will be towards you now that you guys are sort of...over, I guess."

Over? What? No, we're not over! Well, yes we are but it never started to begin with! How could she not let me see him?

"I know," I sighed, fighting back the tears I knew were coming, "I just want to ask him something, really."

She groaned in the phone, a scared and uneasy sound that I was familiar with, "You know, don't you?"

"What?"

"You know about the deal, I can see it in your brain. You know all about it. You were never supposed to find out...," Her voice trailed on, almost like she was speaking to herself.

"No, I don't. I just uhm, wanted to ask him about us," I stammered.

"Mandie, you can't lie to me," She frowned and even through the phone, I could tell she was upset by the news. Was she hiding something too?

"I know," I winced.

I clenched my hand around the phone, mentally begging and pleading that as a girl she could see where I was coming from. I just wanted some closure, any sense of an answer as to why someone would do this to another human being just for some extra power.

I hated him, that was all there was to it.

"I'm sorry, but I can't let you see him. He's not what he used to be right now, I don't know what happened after you two stopped talking, but he's just been different. I don't want anything to happen to you if you decided to come here."

Why was she being so protective? It was seriously driving me insane! If I wanted to see him, I should be able to! What did it matter to her?

"Mandie, I'm only looking out for your best interests. So you can stop making me sound like your parent who's trying to split you guys up. I'm only trying to save you in the end."

"I'm sorry," I drudged into the phone, my heart sinking lower and lower as the conversation continued.

My hope of ever seeing him was dwindling, I knew if I was ever going to seek him out, I'd have to do it alone. I felt something different when I was around him and maybe it was the power, maybe it was all fake to begin with, but I remembered him feeling it too.

I was falling for him and as stupid or planned out as it was, I couldn't stop thinking about it. Physically and mentally I felt drained the last few days, all the time. Not only was my heart trying to recover, but so was my body.

"I just don't know what to do with myself," I responded, looking over my shoulder to see Jessica perched at my doorway. I closed my eyes, shaking my head as I awaited her answer.

"Move on," She stated boldly, her voice coming across colder then usual.

"How can it be that easy?" I steadied myself, feeling Jessica come behind like she knew. If only she really knew the heartache I was going through, she'd understand how beat up I was about talking to him again.

"It's not," She answered, another muffled voice coming to the other end. I pressed the phone back up against my ear, feeling the plastic of my case wedge into my cheek.

"I've gotta go," She finally mentioned and immediately I laid back against the bed.

No!

"I know it's not easy, Mandie. But believe me when I say this isn't easy for him either. He's going through the same withdraw and he's doing this for your own good. People are starting to find out about you and he doesn't want anyone else finding out who you are. After Robbie died, it's been a hell house over here. Everyone is questioning him, us...it's just too crazy over here."

I heavily debated begging, I didn't know Sabina well enough for it to embarrass me entirely. How could this be the end? This was the only 'closure' I was going to get? A small phone call with someone who knew him?

"Please," I whispered, my eyes already boiling over in tears. I couldn't take it anymore.

"Mandie," She sighed, understanding my pain.

"If it makes you feel any better, nothing is going on with anyone else. He's not with another girl and he hasn't even been seen talking to one. He's going through the same thing as you right now."

It wasn't enough, I needed more. I had to know what he was thinking, I didn't care how creepy it came across. My heart was literally breaking, right in front of me and the pain that followed was out of this world.

"How do you know?" I winced, wiping away a few salty tears from my cheeks. I reached out for Jessica's hand, gripping it tighter as I began to spiral into another depression.

She paused for a long time, silence pierced through the receiver as I began wondering if she'd aready clicked off.

"He's my brother," She whispered, the words cracking into my ear drums, "I always know what he's up to. Always."

And she clicked off.

With my mouth agape and tears streaming down my cheeks, I could barely process what she'd just told me before finally going over every memory I had of them two. I would have never seen this coming, ever.

"She, he is...oh my, they-they're--"

"Spit it out!" Jessica screeched, dropping my hand.

"They're family," I finished, looking at the dumbfounded expression circling around Jessica's face.