Dancing In The Stars

- 18 -

A/N - hi I start highschool tomorrow and I'm v scared ok bye
• S • August 6, 2019 •

- Leo -

"Alright, so it looks like the tumor hasn't grown since the last time we checked. That's great news! If you guys change your mind about treatment, you can call us any time. It's strongly recommended that you take the treatment, though. Miracles do happen," my doctor says.

When neither of us speak, he continues, "I have a patient, Michael Jennings. He has this cancer but it's much more aggressive and advanced. He's been getting treatment for 6 years, that's 4 years longer than the life expectancy with this. Think about it,"

I nod, but Libra doesn't even look up. I thank the doctor and we leave.

In the car, she doesn't look at me. Her face is turned to the window, her eyes glued to the trees that pass by every second.

"I want you to get treatment," I say.

"No,"

"Please,"

"No,"

"Please. If not for you, for me."

"Leo!" She yells. "No. This isn't about you. This is about me. I'm going to die, okay. And I'm trying to accept it, so I need you to accept it too."

I grip the steering wheel so tight that my knuckles turn white. "I need you," I say quietly.

She sighs. "You'll be okay,"

"Don't tell me what I'll be!" I yell. "I won't be okay! I need you. I can't live without you!"

She leans back in the seat, her eyes closed as she takes a deep breath. "This isn't about you..."

"Part of it is, though,"

"No, it's not."

"It is!" I yell again.

"Stop yelling at me! Stop yelling,"

"It's about me too, Libra. I love you. I need you, and you're slipping away,"

"I can't help it,"

"Yes, you can,"

"No! I'm gonna die anyway. Did you hear what that doctor said? That patient has been fighting for his life for 6 years. I don't want that. I can't do that,"

"You aren't fighting," I say as I pull in to the driveway.

"I can't,"

"You'll live,"

"That's not a life," she says, clearly agitated.

I turn off the car and turn to her. Her blue eyes are reddened and puffy.

"I need you, Li,"

She shakes her head, looking away.

"Please," I repeat.

"Stop, Leo. I don't want chemo, and I'm not going to get it,"

I open the door and get out, slamming it behind me.

"Stop acting so selfish!" She yells after me.

"I know, Libra. It's not about me," I say, walking to the house. I feel like one of the characters in a cartoon with so much anger that there's smoke coming out of their ears.

"Leo!" She says when she gets inside. She closes the door.

"Stop talking," I say.

"That's not fair,"

"What's not fair is that you're leaving me, and you don't care! That's not fair!" I want to stomp my foot like a child.

She crosses her arms. "I have cancer. I don't want it, but I have it. Are you gonna support me, or are you gonna keep acting like a selfish dickhead?"

I take a deep breath and urge myself to stop yelling. "I love you. I want to have kids with you and I wanna get married. I wanna hold your hand when we watch our kids walk down the aisle after they've found the one they wanna spend forever with. I wanna go home with you and cry with you on the porch swing because our babies are all grown up. But we aren't going to get any of that, and I don't know how to deal with that,"

She sighs and hugs me, putting her head on my shoulder. "I'm a romantic," I say. "And the fantasies in my head don't end with you dying. I don't know how to deal with it,"

"Me neither. We'll learn together,"

"I don't wanna learn,"

"Me neither,"