Beautiful Disaster

Broken Dreams

Four years, she spent four long years of her life with David. All she ever wanted was to be married to him and build a family of their own. Their life had been all planned out. Unfortunately, it was now all but a plan. David left her for someone else. And there she was, miserable, sulking in her room due to extreme sadness and disappointment. She lost her job, she lost her self, she lost everything...

"I don't love you anymore. I'm in love with someone else, and she really makes me happy.", she recalled.

Those were the exact words David said to her before he left, and were probably the most painful words she had heard in her entire life. Those words were like arrows piercing through her heart one after the other that she could not imagine how she had managed to survive. Yes, she survived, but until now it felt like she's still fighting for her life. Had she known it was going to be this painful, she would have had chosen not to fall in love. Oh, well! It's as if she really did had a choice. It's so unfortunate that love doesn't work that way. You just can't tell your self to stop loving a person anytime you want to. When love hits you, sometimes it hits you bad - really bad.

Until now, there were questions in her mind that she couldn't find answers. All she knew was she had given everything for that relationship to work. Yet, it still ended up miserably bad. Will she ever be enough for someone? She began doubting and questioning her self. It's been two months since David left her, but the pain remained the same. It didn't fade, not even little.

"Geez! Are you crying again?", said Sophie as she was coming near her. She's still in bed and she didn't even hear her open the door. She wiped her tears immediately and tried to compose herself. She did not even realize that tears already started falling from her eyes as she remembered what happened.

"No, I am not crying.", she said as she pulled herself up from bed. She tried to appear enthusiastic in her response. She didn't want Sophie to see that she's still crying over David. She didn't want her sister to worry. Sophie had been scolding her for throwing away everything after the break-up and she could not blame her. It was a desperate decision and was made out of impulse. It was an unthought of one. She was hurt, she was frustrated, all she ever wanted then was to hide her self to the world.

Sophie sat in front of her, held her chin up so she can see her face fully.

"You are such a terrible liar!", Sophie exclaimed.

She could no longer hold it back. It felt like she's about to explode. She decided to bury her face on to Sophie's shoulder as she felt she needed it. She needed comfort.

"I'm trying Soph, believe me I'm trying.", she said as she started to weep. Sophie hugged her tight and tried to comfort her by gently rubbing her back. Unfortunately, that gesture didn't help to calm her as it made her cry even more.

"Shhh... you need to be strong. Mom is so worried about you. I am worried about you.", Sophie said in a soft voice.

Franki could not stop her self from crying. It felt like she wanted to let everything out just this one time. The weight was already too much for her to carry. One last cry and she promised to herself that she'll be over it. She's already emotionally exhausted. At some point, she knew she needs to make a decision to be okay. She needs to be okay.

"David is a bastard. When will you realize that? You clearly don't deserve him. He is not worth of your tears, Frances!", she felt Sophie's anger and frustrations in that statement.

Well, Sophie's right. She don't deserve to suffer like this. She needs to help her self move on. Two months of being miserable is enough - she badly needs to get back on track.

She pulled away from Sophie, sat straight and took a deep breath. "You're right, Soph. I cannot stay like this while he is enjoying his life.", she was determined. She have lost a lot already.

"That's exactly what I was telling you about! Believe me, one day, you'll look back to this day and will just laugh at everything."

She hugged Sophie tight and thanked her. She's so lucky to have Sophie by her side. She's nothing but grateful for the support that her family had given her especially during these tough times. They chose to understand what she had to go through.

"By the way, mom called. She said you might want to consider going to the Philippines for a vacation. And I think that makes sense, maybe it's what you need - a change of environment. What do you think?", said Sophie.

She didn't know what to say. It sounded like a great idea but she wasn't sure if it's something she'll have the courage to try. Although, she had been wanting to visit the Philippines for the longest time.

"Think about it, okay?", Sophie added before leaving.

Maybe her mom was right. What if all she needs to do is to be away from all the things that remind her of David? Maybe, just maybe, it would be easier for her to forget about everything that way.

Franki couldn't stop thinking about it. She has never been to the Philippines and she don't know what to expect about the place, but the idea of it gives her the feeling of excitement - and fear at the same time. It excites her as it's something new, but change is fearful too. But, if this change is the way to mend her broken heart, why wouldn't she want to give it a try? Right now, she's willing to consider any options she could possibly take.