Mistakes (Jeff the Killer X OC)

Nightmares

~~~Astrid's POV~~~

After Jeff so kindly told me to not bother him for anything, I decided that I'd had enough of his hostility and went to bed.

Of course, I was tired from the events of the day, and after some good food and a warm shower, I was ready to crash.  EJ had helped me change the bandages, and to my horror I had some wounds that would definitely scar.  The bullet wound was one of them.

Honestly, I don't know how I could walk around and act like I was fine.  In reality the pain was terrible.  EJ had given me some painkillers but they didn't seem to have much effect.

Either way, I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillows.

Like usual, I had a dreamless sleep.  The few times when I actually dreamed, my dreams were normally riddled with nightmares.  Nightmares were bad, and they made me feel unsafe when I woke up.  But dreamless nights left me uneasy.

They left me with the feeling that there was something I should know, something I overlooked.

I slept until a noise jerked me awake.

I immediately sat up on my bed and glanced around the room.  My senses screamed danger and I was going to kick someone's ass if they tried to kill me.  However, with the faint light provided by the moon through the curtainless window, I could see that there was no one in sight. 

Except Jeff, who was sleeping in his own bed.  I didn't know what time it was, but the eerie silence told me that it was really, really late. 

I was wondering why on Heaven's name I was awake, and then I remembered.

The noise. 

I looked around, trying to pinpoint the location and noticed a knife on the floor beside Jeff's bed.  Maybe it just fell from the nightstand, or the bed, or wherever he kept it.

I was about to go back to sleep when I realized that he just wouldn't remain still.  In all the time I had been up, he hadn't stopped moving for a second.

He just kept toss and turning, murmuring gibberish in his sleep.  I slowly pushed the covers away from me and sat on the edge of my bed, facing his own.

"No, no...  I told you, I don't know."  He murmured, flinching violently and turning once again.

He had a sleeping mask on, but I didn't need to see his eyes to notice the sheer discomfort of whatever dream he was having.

Not wanting to cross into his side of the room, I grabbed one of my pillows and tossed it towards him.  He didn't stir.  Instead, he kept tossing and turning, eventually knocking the pillow to the floor. 

I grabbed my other pillow and threw it with more force, hoping to wake him up.  Again, nothing.  He just kept mumbling and moving on the bed. 

Waking him up was a terrible idea.  He would either get mad at me for breaking his rules, or he would accidentally stab me thinking I was hostile.  However, I couldn't just leave him at the mercy of the night terrors.

It was an instinct, an impulse.

The same thing that brought me to follow the men that had tortured him, brought me to wake him up.

I got up from the bed and approached him.  Slowly, I put a hand on his shoulder.  He did not react.

I shook him gently, his mumbling got faster, more desperate.  He began to lurch violently on the bed.  Before it escalated further, I grasped his shoulder and shook him while saying his name.

"Jeff, Jeffrey wake up."  I said, shaking his shoulder.  "Jeff, JEFF!"

Before I knew it, he had grabbed my hand, and put his other hand on my shoulder.  In one smooth movement, he shoved me down into the mattress, and rose.  He let go of my shoulder and reached under his pillow for what I assumed was his knife.  Upon failing to grasp it, he leaned back on the bed and reached under the mattress, grabbing another knife.

All of this he did without vision, so of course, he didn't know it was me. 

He put the tip of the knife under my chin, disencouraging any further movement. 

"Don't move."  He growled, letting go of my hand to remove the sleeping mask.  The moment it was off, his eyes landed on me.  Honestly, I was frightened.  I couldn't even speak, I was terrified.  I saw my life flash before my eyes and it was terrible.

The moment he realized it was me a flicker of recognition passed his features.  But he didn't seem eager to lower the knife.

He straddled my waist and let the tip of the knife rest on my neck. 

"What are you doing?"  He hissed, tossing the mask onto his nightstand.

"You were tossing and turning so I-"  I began, trying to get as many words as I could out.  But he wasn't having it.

"You broke the rules, Astrid.  I told you, and you didn't listen."  He said, adding a bit of pressure on the knife.  I swear, I stopped breathing. 

"You were having a nightmare, Jeff.  I'm sorry, I just...  I thought..."  My thoughts evaded my mind.  I took a sharp intake of breath.

"You thought what?  That I'd thank you?  That I'd be grateful?"  He asked, his tone dripping with venom.  "You're pathetic."

And for some reason, that was what sent me hurling off the edge.  Suddenly, before I could even attempt to stop myself, tears filled my eyes.  Then, I couldn't help but sob in despair.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I did listen and I do know the rules, hell I would have woken you up sooner if I wasn't thinking about the stupid rules, but you were having nightmares and I know how bad they can get and I just couldn't leave you at their mercy.  I'm sorry, I just thought it would be better to wake you up than to leave you like that.  I was thinking about the rules, I swear.  I didn't mean to anger you, I'm sorry.  I'm sorry, please don't kill me.  Please, I just- I wanted- I could-"  I broke into sobs once again, the sheer hopelessness was so horrible.

Back at my house, I had the chance to fight back.

Back at the torture room, I had the chance to escape.

But here, just one swift flick of his wrist, a good shove and I was dead.

Slowly, Jeff lifted the knife.  He got off from me and moved to stand beside his bed.  Before he could even say anything, I stood up and walked quickly to the door.

"Where are you going?"  He asked, but I was already out of the room and heading towards the front door.  I needed air, I needed to breathe.  I felt lightheaded, my heart was pounding so loudly, I was trembling.

My eyes focused on the door, it seemed so far away.  Trying to get to it was like trying to swim through pudding.  My breaths became shorter and faster, black spots danced in my vision.

"Astrid?"  The voice sounded far away, it was as if I was underwater. 

And then, everything went completely dark.