Patience is a Virtue(Under MAJOR editing)

chapter 10

**josh POV**

did she say I love you more than pizza? Wasn’t that after… the… accident…?

“ah ha!”

I get it! She remembered something! Mabye I should recreate some stuff and memories might come back to her! I smile gleefully to myself and walk on home thinking of our favorite places.

**crystal POV**

I smile to myself thinking thank god I got the confidence to do that kind of stuff. Im getting pretty good at this sort of thing. So I go to my room and sit on my desk and try to do homework. Bleck.

I get bored and start to wonder around my room. I end up  looking at pictures. There is a lot of them of me and bell and me and cal and me and josh. God theres a lot of those. We are kissing in them and some I am smiling at the camera and there is adoration in my eyes josh is kissing the side of my head smiling a very cute and has love printed all over this. I leave that one and put it on my dresser. I look at the ones with me and calvin. He looks at me cutely and I look away laughing. Theres not a lot of them but theres one that stands out. He and I are cheek to cheek and are looking into the camera smiling but he is looking at me and it looks like he really likes me. wow that is new…

The ones of me and bell are distinguent. Very normal and I remember some of them because their older and so I know those. I dig deeper and there the drawer stops. I look confusedly at it and look for an opening.

It took awhile but I finally got it open! I smile smugly to myself and open the layer. Theres a book. Like a diary. I frown at it and remember! Ohh what I got for my 16th birthday. I didn’t really write in it much so why hide. I flip through and there is a TON of writing dating after my 17 th party. So I sit on the bed and start to read through it.

‘oh my god my parents died. There is a big hole in my heart from that and all I want to do is die. I cant get out of the hospital yet but bell graciously brought me this. I cant believe that they died. I miss them soo much already. I didn’t mean to drink. I cant remember much from that but I remember Cals face. His pretty face. I think hes working out.’

That was one. I roll my eyes but they have tears in them. I seem to have that all ready covered because the page is crinkled like there was so many tears that the page waved. I add in a few more. At the bottom I read some thing I wrote something small. ‘I look at her handwriting everyday just to remember her though. It is hard. I miss her. to much. Life is too hard now. I just want to go. To go and never come back. Fly away because that’s what I did. I feel guilty. Its my fault and their dead because of that.’

I flip the pages and read on. there are a lot of more depressing entries. Then it says I go to the funeral.

‘that was the hardest thing I had to do. I took one look at my parents closed caskets and burst into tears and cal had to lead me away from them and calm me down. It has been weeks and I finally get out of the hospital and the first thing I go to is a funeral. My parents funeral. I cry thorough out tole thing and I place my bracelet in my moms casket and a note in my dads. The bracelet is something we did together and it was for the both of us. My dad was explainging I love you and im sorry and I don’t think ill be able to move on from this.’

I am in tears from that and I look around and fish in my brain trying to remember. Nope.

I close the notebook and lay back down and  wallow in my tears. And  in that process I fall asleep.

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“crystal wake up! its time for school!”

 I wake up to a screaming bell.

“ok jeez ill be out soon.”

“I mean it.”

 “fine” I grumble to myself and get up unwillingly.

By the time I get down the stairs it is later. I am dressed in some light faded skinny jeans and a long baby blue long sleeved shirt. Don’t feel like dressing up. as I lace up my converse bell tells me some stuff. I mumble along pretending to listen.

“did you hear me?”

“no.”

“its Friday for gods sake. Wake up. and the dance is tomorrow! Cant you be alittle excited?”

I give a smile the best I could. “yeah good.”

She frowns at my bad attempts but thinks of an idea. “want to stop for coffee?”

I perk up. “sure.”

She laughs at me. “wow the only thing to make you look happy in life. Coffee. Wow…”

I roll my eyes at her and go get my bag and school bag and we go to starbucks.

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I take a sip of my hot coffee and put it on the ground to get my books at my locker. I reach up and feel a woosh of air then cal is drinking my coffee.

“thanks! I needed this.”

I swat at him hissing “give it up. Now.”

He hands it back right away. “jeez no need to be mad.”

“Im not.”

“well you sure are acting like that.”

“whatever.” I roll my eyes and slam my locker shut. Maybe I am alittle grumpy? I start to walk away but cal puts a hand on my arm stopping me.

“can I ask you a question?”

“yea sure cal what do you need?”

he thinks for a moment then says it. “will you go to the winter formal with me tomorrow?”

I dreaded that. I walk away with dread in my eyes. “I don’t know.”

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aww cute? dont you think that goes with my NEW cover?? well she has black hair in the book but brown in the cover... OH WELL.....

 lol well thanks for reading it my lovelies. i love you guys so much!!! and dont forget to check out my friends book whos evil by sweetandsassy98!! she'll love that i said that even though i dont have much readers myself... try to make this popular!!! i love people to read this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!