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For those who describe love as kind I would like to tell them they are lying. Love is dangerous. Love is a sick game of cat and mouse that often leaves one person the hunted while the other is hunting them. Thomas Shelby taught me that. In the mere seconds I saw my oldest friend flash to his former self, I should have felt the chaos that was bounding towards us. Ada and Freddie were happily cooing at their new baby boy when we heard the police banging on the door. Someone had let them know Freddie was out of hiding. Someone had broken this new family's peace. That someone had to be Tommy no one else knew Freddie would be here.
Polly dragged me with her to the garrison to yell at Tommy. I had seen her rage many times in my life, but this time it was worse. There was no talking her down. I would be more surprised if she didn't threaten to shoot his brains out then if she did.
"How could you do this to her!! You bloody bastard!" Polly screamed marching straight towards Tommy. "She's your sister for fuck sakes could you not let her have this one happy moment?" She wagged her finger in his face the steam billowing out of her ears. "First you try to marry off John then you rip Ada's husband away from her. You call yourself a family man but you aren't. You're all about yourself. About your gain. Fuck you Thomas. Fuck you." The pub went silent as Polly stormed out leaving me behind with the remaining Shelbys. All the brothers stared at me for answers but I was at a loss for words. I didn't know how Tommy would come back from this, and even if he did, I wasn't sure if Ada would ever forgive him.
"I was wrong you're nothing like the man you used to be."
— Ada took Karl into hiding the moment she could. She refused to speak or even think about Tommy. I didn't blame her. How could I? Polly and I would take food to her as often as we could, begging her to come out. Claiming we could protect her from whatever Tommy would throw at us next even if we knew the truth was we couldn't.
"We should talk," Tommy stopped me in the kitchen. "I need you to come work the books for me." I stared at him for a moment before going back to preparing lunch. I could feel his patience slipping the longer I ignored him. I downed the rest of my whisky and turned on my heel ready to throw the glass and him but he caught my wrist. "Noel that's enough." He warned.
"No." I spat pulling myself away from his grasp. "I barely even recognize you. What you've done to Ada makes me physically ill Thomas. I can handle you not giving a shit about me, but her your own blood." I composed myself. "I'll work for you on one condition."
"Why is there always conditions with you?" A small laugh left his lips.
"Because I know how this works Thomas, and you broke a promise to me. Time you redeem yourself for that one. You bring Freddie home or those books of yours...well let's not find out what will happen to them."
— Working in the betting shop wasn't as hectic as I had thought it would be. Maybe due to the fact that I had always had a way with numbers. Or maybe having John around me more made it seem more calm. Just hearing his voice had always brought me a sense of peace. Tommy on the other hand kept yelling at his brother for getting distracted by me being there. It was almost as if we were kids in school again. Completely lost in each other's eyes desperate for one another's touch.
"Have you done what I asked?" I walked into Tommy's office swiping the cigarette from his hands and I hauling sharply.
"I'm working on it." He grumbled.
"Well work faster." I snapped.
"Listen here just because you're fucking my brother." Tommy jumped up from his chair and stalked towards me.
"I dare you to pull that gun out. I fucking dare you." I stood my ground knowing neither of us would back down. "I am here because you asked me to be here. I am here because I deserve to be here Thomas so these empty threats of yours will do nothing but fuel the threats I'm willing to act out do you understand." I patted his chest kissing his cheek. "I should fear you, but I don't have the energy."
— Exhaustion had almost taken over my body by the time I crawled to the garrison that night. I was ready to find John and take us both home. Music filled my ears as I reached for the heavy wooden door the scene that waited for me on the other side was like a dream. Sitting in the Shelby's normal booth were all the people I had grown to love. Polly, John, Arthur, Finn, Ada and even Freddie sat there holding baby Karl.
"This isn't real I've fallen asleep at my desk. How?" I looked at Tommy for answers and then at Ada who was smiling brighter than I had ever seen.
"There's something important happening tonight that we needed the whole family for," Tommy explained.
"And what would that be?" I watched as John slid out of the booth and got down on one knee and pulled out a tiny green velvet box. "John? John what are they doing?"
"It's tomorrow Noel you know exactly what I'm doing. So what do ya say will you becoming Mrs John Shelby." I kneeled down in front of him happy tears escaping my eyes and held his face in my hands I kissed him softly.
