Secret Love (A Severus Snape Romance)

Chapter 20: A Long Week

I didn't see Severus Snape for a whole week and that was the second worst week of my entire life. The worst one had obviously been when my little brother had died. Of course I shouldn't compare these two things to each other but that one week without Snape, me being at home doing nothing and waiting for some kind of letter from Dumbledore to inform me what I was supposed to do next, was killing me inside.

So, I spent that week mostly in my room binge watching stupid baking shows and sleeping restlessly. I sat by my window every night waiting for Snape to appear again, but he didn't, and I didn't even hear a single word from anyone at Hogwarts. I was very mad at the whole world and as if all of that wasn't already enough suffering for me, I also got sick. I threw up at least a few times a day and I had really sudden mood swings.

When the week was coming to the end, Snape finally appeared under my  window, looking even more serious than usual.

I took my jacket and climbed quietly from my window to the garden where my lover was waiting for me.

I looked at him suspiciously, trying to stay mad at him for not showing up for such a long time but his beautiful dark eyes made my heart melt and I couldn't help but give him a warm hug.

"Where the hell have you been?" I asked.

"I've been really busy at Hogwarts, but don't worry, everything's fine now and the situation has calmed. Dumbledore hushed it all up so no one thinks that we've ever even been together. But then again, Draco is somehow still extremely mad at you so who knows what he might be up to next. Anyway, my career is saved for now, and so are your studies."

"Well, that's cool. You could've at least come to say hi. I haven't been the best."

"What's wrong? Is it your foolish parents?"

"It's not them, not really. I've just been quite lonely and also I have this weird sickness..."

"Oh, I hope you'll get well soon, darling", he says and kisses me on my forehead.

"So, when can I go back to Hogwarts?"

"Tomorrow! You need to pack your bags and Dumbledore will take you to Hogwarts tomorrow morning."

"That's great! I'm so glad this is all over", I say and sigh deeply. "We need to be more careful, Severus."

"Definitely. Well, I should leave you to pack your things up. Good night." He doesn't make any eye contact and then hugs me quickly.

"You can still stay for a while..." I say but he doesn't hear me as he turns around and disappears somewhere into the darkness. Why is he so cold again? A week ago he would've killed someone for me, or he would've gladly lost everything else as long as he'd have me. But now he's like I'm just an annoying student or something, and it fucking breaks my heart.

I let the tears stream down my face as I climb back to my room through the window. I can't sleep and I can't think about anything or anyone else but Snape. I realize what a huge crazy mess I am.