I Can't Live Without You (Sixth book of the Finnick and Annie series)

Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Finnick's POV

Why are there people like Alexa? Why are there people that only live to make others miserable? Why are there people that like to push you down when you're just getting up? I don't know. No one knows. Alexa has now threatened my daughter. Maggie. Now she's after not only myself but two of my kids. Whose next, Finn? I can't let her hurt my kids. I know I have to go with her when the time comes, since the government won't do anything or believe us. But I also know that Annie needs me. She can't let me go, but I know she feels the same way about our baby. I can't make the decision for her, she has to. And she has to make the right one. And we need to get help for Maggie. I wonder if Alexa would know if I sent her to twelve with Darius. But I know they're happy here. He has a job, she has her friends and her school. I don't know the solution. And it scares me everyday that I won't find one. It scares me even more that when it's time for Annie to make the decision she chooses me over our baby.

Alexa's message was; "Maybe I need to make the decision easier for precious Annie. You see, I want her to pick the baby, because what I want is you. So, you can let her know that her lovely daughter Maggie, naive Maggie who thinks she can stop me, has been added to the equation. If she chooses you, she loses not only the baby, but Maggie as well."

My heart broke inside of me, how could she do this? I thought she was my friend, I never thought she'd hurt anyone, I never thought she'd hurt me this way.

I have to tell Annie I just don't know how. She's out grocery shopping and I need to tell her when she gets back. I don't want her to choose the baby over me, but the selfish part of me wants- no, needs to be with her. I can't tell her that, she'll listen. She'll go on about how much she needs me and sooner or later I'll begin to believe her, I can't let her convince me that giving up our kids is the right way to go.

I'm a bad person and a bad father for even considering telling her how I am actually feeling. Our kids are our priorities, and I shouldn't be looking for anything different than keeping them safe.

What's making my skin crawl is how Alexa is setting it all up. She doesn't even want a family she wants a boyfriend or a husband or whatever and she's planning on taking me. Rather than being a normal person, and going out and finding her own personal love of her life that's not married to her sister.

I realize I'm crying, and I start grabbing at my hair like I always do. I run down the stairs to the room of my nightmares.

I grab my trident, and I make a dash for the door.

"Finn-" I see Annie carrying her groceries.

"Annie, I'll be back in a minute or so, okay?" I ask.

"Okay,"

I run for the beach and I don't care that I'm breaking the law by running around with an unconcealed weapon and all of that nonsense. I should be in jail already for all the people I've killed. But you seem to get a get out of jail free card if snow ever tortured you or someone you love.

I get to the beach and run for the water. I just start skewering fish as rapidly as possible and I don't stop, I can't.

I'm going to lose her. I'm going to lose her. I'm going to lose her. And Maggie. And my baby. And Finn. And Angie. And my grandkids, my Faith and Alex. I'm losing all of them and I can't do anything but kill another person!

I stop when I see all of the fish on every sharp point of my trident. I feel better, as far as anger goes. But not better about the actual situation.

I'll just take the fish down to the shop and give them to the salesman there, we used to buy from him when I was a kid. I know he's getting older. He won't be there very much longer.

I walk over there and the bell at the top of the door rings as I walk in.

"Finnick!" He says.

"Hi Mr. Canova, I have some fish that I just caught for you," I tell him.

"Oh thank you, I was running low. Your wife was actually just in here buying some salmon," he says.

"That's my favorite," I say.

"Has been since you were just a boy," he says and smiles. "How much for all of it?"

I take them all off my trident and leave them on the counter, "There all your's, no need for a payment."

"I can't just take them all for free," he insists.

"Trust me, it's okay," I tell him. "I'll see you later,"

"Of course, thank you, a lot, Finnick." He says.

"No problem," I walk out the door, and start walking home.

When I get there, and walk through the doors, Annie is already sitting at the dining table, looking ready to question me on everything that I know.

"Wanna tell me what's going on?" She asks, emotionlessly.

I just nod, and sit down across from her. "Alexa called, well. . . Left a message." 

"And," is all she says.

"And it's more important that you don't choose me," I explain. "Because if you do then Maggie will go with her," 

She looks like her world is going to start crumbling. She puts her hands on her head, and starts pulling at her hair like I've always done.

She looks up with watery eyes and mumbles, "Our lives are such a mess." 

Authors Note

Hey guys, sorry for the REALLY late and overdo update. I've been ridiculously busy with school and everything, hopefully they become more frequent.

By the way, I saw Mockingjay opening night. (Spoilers Below) 

WARNING: THIS WILL BE A SERIOUS ZONE OF FAN-GIRLING AS WELL AS RANTING, READ AT YOUR OWN RISK

Oh my gosh! So first Gale yells at Katniss about Peeta being tortrued and I sit there crying and feeling miserable and hating him more than ever as her world is tumbling down and all he has to say is how bad of a person Peeta is for listening to the capitol and my friend and I are like holding back booing at the screen and I'm sitting here mentally planning 1000 ways to murder him. 

Then, Peeta comes back and strangles her and I swear I let out a noise that sounds like a dying animal, (don't know where it came from) and I cry again and then when it's over my heart is beating it's way out of my chest and then, lastly, when she sees him struggling in the chair I cry one more time and by the time the credits are rolling I'm under my Mockingjay blanket rocking back and forth and crying.

So yes, that was my beautiful experience and I highly approved of the movie. Love ya Francis Lawrence. RIP Philip Seymour Hoffman... ;-(

Talk to you all next time! Merry Christmas (or Happy Holidays') Byeee.

~JustKeepSwimming4712