Journal

9

I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't know why I'm so insecure and why I feel so lonely and why I'm so filled with anxiety and why I'm so different but Ik it all started when he broke up with me. Now don't take that the wrong way. I don't mean that he did this to me. I don't mean he is the cause of everything that I have wrong with me but he did play a small role in doing so. I'm not mad at him about it though. But that's not what this is about. I feel so unwanted and unworthy. I feel like I have to try to be friends with everyone or try to even be excepted by the people around me. I feel like so many people hate me. I feel like I'm doing all of this alone. Like I said in one of the past journal things, I know people have it worse and that's why I keep it together, but this pain is a lot more than I've experienced in the past. I know it isn't he end but it's the beginning of my journey. I know with my head that I'm beautiful and I'm kind and I'm loved but feeling it is so hard. I want to feel beautiful, kind, and loved instead of knowing that I am. Just because I know it doesn't mean I feel it. It hurts but I'll keep pushing. As Josh Dun and Tyler Joseph would say "Stay Alive"