Journal

11

The youth went to this MERGE thing and (obviously) He went and we were standing in line for 9 square and he looks at me and asks "What's wrong?" Those two small familiar words along with his comforting familiar voice frazzled my brain. I didn't know what to say so I said "Oh... Nothing" I wish I could have said something else like... maybe actually tell him whats wrong. When I heard him say that the whole earth stopped and nothing mattered except our small 3 word conversation. I wish I would have told him about my anxiety about my loneliness about how manipulated I feel. I wish I could have hugged him and told him everything while he tells me that I'll be ok. I wish he'd text me. Maybe I'll be adventurous and text him first. I hope he doesn't hate me. I hope he still wants to be my friend. Well... Wish me luck. I'm going to try to tell him that I lied when I said nothing. I won't go into detail but I'll give him a brief overview or summary as to what exactly is wrong.