The girl I knew... is alive.

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The girl I knew is not missing.

She's hidden from the cruel messed up decisions she has picked which altered her universe,

but she is not gone.

She's hiding in the shadows of others because the comfort of darkness consumed her but these growing pains are causing too much pain to bear.

As if the skeleton of the person she once knew doesn't mold the same way it used to.

As if... she's outgrown the place she called home.

The girl I knew is not missing.

She's wandering the world aimlessly; without a plan or desire to follow any given road.

Her soul is gone and she's looking for the source of happiness in the crevices of the abyss she's in, 

not knowing that she is the source of warmth, but the light has dimmed down and once again, she feels cold from the world, from herself.

The inability to forgive her mistakes causes them to constant replay in her broken mind as if it was a record on repeat and the inability to move her feet towards letting go of the pain.

The girl I knew is not gone.

She is trying to maintain the facade that everything is great because life moves on.

She is trying to keep the pieces of her castle of glass together that it penetrates through her skin.

She is trying to have control over her emotions by running endlessly through the tasks of the day.

 She is trying to maintain the strength by continuing on in life despite the broken wounds that pierce her heart with every breath she takes,

continuing on in life by walking without direction despite her broken leg;

not giving herself a chance to properly acknowledge the pain and accept it for what is it.

But don't be mistaken, 

the girl I knew is not missing.

She is growing like a caterpillar in its cocoon;

slowly but surely growing into something much greater.

The girl I knew is not missing,

She is hiding from the world, squeezing herself into a shell that no longer suits her 

until the day comes 

and

 she flies.


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