Acceptance

Chapter 13

Waking up the next morning I showered with my vanilla cream body wash and got up and put on my vanilla cream body butter i dont know why but vanilla is my new favorite scent. I pulles on some nicks jogging pants a white shirt brushing my hair down and putting on nicks beanie my jordans and a jean jacket i made a funny face in the mirror and took a picture posting it on Insta and grabbing my keys and wallet off the dresser before making my way down stairs and eating some fruit. Soon as i was done with fruit my doorbell was ringing and i just knew it was nick so i put my bowl in the dishwasher and made my way to the front door and there she stood in a black shirt hair out and a pair of black adida sweat pants with her jordans on "Look at you thugging and what not" she said smiling i laughed "Whatever you ready" "Yea we stopping at mickey d's tho i want a parfait" i nodded closed my door locked it and and walked yo her waiting with the passenger door open i got in she closed the door and walked to her side getting in starting up the car and pulling off.

We pulled up to the school and stepped out the car together and headed for the main entrance recieving heys as we went in Nick grabbed my hand an an i looked over at her a little frightened to let the whole school know i was gay its not something that i fully put out ther but looking at her i realized i had nothing to be afraid of and if no one liked me then oh well they can step. Gabby came running up to us smiling "Ahhh shit naw please tell me this means what i think it means" i laughed at how excited she sounded "Yea Riya finally said yea to real nigga" nick said boasting i mugged her "You been hanging round my daddy to long and yes were finally a couple" she squealed "When this happen and why you aint call me" I shrugged "It happened wednesday and i really wasnt thinking about it" she mugged me "Umm hmm i want details" she said i nodded and made my way to my locker gathering my books and everything i needed and went to class.

After numerous of classes it was now time for lunch and we decided to hit up a pizza joint not to far from school. Pulling up Napoli pizza and pasta i parked my car and me nick gabby and John got out we went inside and sat at any table looking at the menu. "Ooo this mostacholli sound good" gabby said i looked at what she was talking about "Yea it do but i want this lasagna" it was three meat and two cheeses i looked over at nick "Baby you know what you getting" she was all in her phone "Yea get me three slices of pepperoni pizza and a pepsi" she never looked up from her phone which by the way had a pink case on it so i took a off guard pic and laughed when she flicked me off "What you looking at anyways" i asked "Nothing im tweeting" i laughed "Girl stop" she cracked a smile when my phone vibrated on the table i picked it up to see a new text from her "You petty" i said smiling then clicked on the message to open it and read it.

ButterCup ❤: Dear Beautiful,

My beautiful Love, you are my sunrises and sunsets. You are my world and have been since the first time I saw you from afar. My heart leapt in my chest and I had to catch my breath - the vision of you stole it from me. Hair lightly blowing in the breeze and the sun bouncing off your face making your eyes sparkle like stars in the midnight sky you captured my soul, my heart without speaking a word or even knowing. I felt love for the first time when I looked at you. My world became a beautiful place to live in. I often ask myself what in the world would I do without you? I hope to never find out the answer to that question. I'll love you forever and always

The smile on my face was so big I'm pretty sure my face was going to hurt later but how can I not smile at that corny but cute text. What Nick didn't know was she is what kept me sane and happy and since our birthday was coming up I wanted to show her that so I was going to plan her the best surprise (A/N I just realized their ages so until their birthday Riya is 15 and Nick is 17).

Shanti....

I decided I would go spend time with Lea I didn't have any clients today so I wasn't going into the shop. I was determined to cheer her up after the lost of the baby I knew she was going to be hurt but putting on a brave face for everybody else. So after getting dressed in my white long sleeve shirt and my jeans I put on my white and gold studded louboutin sneakers made sure my hair was straight and since mike was at work lonna was at school and lil mike in daycare i was cool so I grabbed my purse and keys and left.

Pulling up to the hospital I parked got out and went inside getting a visitor pass and going to bae room. "Good afternoon my love" I said as I knocked once and went in I smiled seeing Jeremiah in the bed with her "Aye big head get yo stank ass up" I said tapping him he mugged me and got up "Go home wash yo ass and change" Lea laughed he jumped at me and I flinched just a little bit "Scary ass" he mumbled then turned to Lea "I'll be back baby" he kissed her they said their I love yous and he left. I sat in the chair next to the bed "How you feeling baby" I asked sweetly she gave a faint smile "Ready to go" I nodded "I feel you but that's not what I was asking" she blinked a couple times and shrugged "I don't know how to feel I wanna cry but I have to be strong for my family" I fanned her off "Girl stop I'm sure yo husband and kids will understand if you cry...you need to cry it helps you grieve" her eyes watered and Ger voice cracked as she spoke "No I can't allow myself to be weak again Shan I can't do it" looking into her eyes I told her "Aalea you can never be weak you are one of the strongest women I know baby you could have been gave up but you didn't you stayed strong through everything and came back harder but you don't always have to be stronger especially when it comes to losing your baby I'm sure your husband and kids will be very understanding" which is true I couldn't imagine going through any of what she went through but Its time for her to start realizing she has a support system behind her and it's ok to be vulnerable in front of us and her kids. She wiped her eyes and nodded and I smiled at her even though I'm older than her I truly do admire her "My mother once told me the black woman is a work of art, a perfect expression of pain, struggle, strength, and beauty...don't be afraid to let people see you". After saying that we sat and talked for a while and Jer showed up with the kids and I left after giving love to all the twins. I just truly hope she understood what I was saying. 

Jeremiah.....

"You ok babe" I asked Lea she been different since Shanti left "No I'm not ok" she said getting teary eyed I didn't know how to react she was just fine I mean I knew she was putting up a front but I wonder what made her show her true feelings don't get me wrong I'm happy about it because nothing I said worked and it was always "Jeremiah I'm fine" so her saying no she not ok and actually showing it is a surprise.  "What's wrong baby" "I miss her" she cried out" I grabbed her hand" I miss the baby too" she shook her head "She was going to be my baby girl" I climbed in bed and grabbed her hand in mine intertwining our hands "If she was a girl she would have been our baby girl and she would have been gorgeous just like her mother sisters aunties and grandma" she cracked a small smile and turned to me crying into my shirt I wrapped my arms around her encouraging her to let it out "Jermaine get my phone and call Ri to come get yall" he nodded and did as told while I kept comforting my wife it hurt to see her like this and hurt even worse that I couldn't help or prevent it.

Riya showed up kissed her mother took the kids and left. After calming down she looked at me with the most serious expression "Can we make another one" I laughed only to stop and realize she wasn't laughing with me "Like for real for real" she nodded "Dead ass" I kissed her lips and said "Sure baby if that's what you wanna do I'm down" she smiled and kissed me again. A little while later she fell asleep and I layed with her on my chest wondering if I made the right decision I pushed all the negative thoughts away and assured my self it was the right thing to do I mean she is my wife and I would do anything for her and that includes creating another life.

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I know it's short but I'm trying to take the story some where so it's going to speed up a little bit just give me some time I've been battling with this tooth ache for almost three weeks then the dentist finally saw me yesterday tell me why these nights wouldn't even pull my tooth AFTER stating that it was getting a slight infection from being cracked they want me to come back on the 11th like what the hell but emergency room gave me Norcos and Amoxicillin and y'all know the pain real if the Norcos don't work but they gave me a higher dosage until my appointment so I'll be fine hopefully

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Love JayyBev ❤❤