Life's Not A Fairytale.(boyxboy)

Chapter 23

Everyone is running around me shouting all kinds of obscurities through their phones. I'm being transported all over the place without my consent... but I can't protest.  I'm numb.

I can't really move much.  I haven't eaten since earlier at the yogurt place and my stomach is  growling like a pair of  grizzly bears fighting for the last fish in the stream. I can't eat though. Right now, nothing seems like it would stay down anyway... but I'm so hungry.

I'm also mute again.  No more words to leave my voice.  Not even a cry from the pain (emotionally and physically) engulfed through my body. No more hysterical, vial, pained, maniacal laughter to drive me even more through my disgraceful, meltdown of a mind... I'm a vegetable.

There's absolutely nothing I can do but sit here on this family couch of lonliness.

Dallas carried me in from the car and layed me down here two hours ago.  I still haven't moved from this spot. He's tried the whole time to get me to talk and eat, but I only have the strength to avert my eyes... nothing else.

Now he just sits here with me.  My head in his lap and his steady and calm fingers brushing through my moistureless, dying hair. He's been talking to me this whole time... I don't hear his voice but, I just know.  I can feel it

Austin has covered us both in the old Spongebob Squarepants fleece that I used to carry as a child.  And after placing a gentle kiss on my forehead he sat down in my mother's comfort rocking chair. He'd said something after the kiss but,  I couldn't make out his words very clearly.

I hear mostly nothing except a slow ringing in my ears. And my whole vision is foggy. I've just been knowing where things are and who they are by their shapes...

I don't know what's going on with me.  I guess I'm just basically going fucking crazy right now. I mean other than Jamie I have no one in my life that understands like my dad did. My heart is... was basically a triangle of true love. Just me, Jaime and my dad.

He's gone now and never coming back. HE'S GONE FOREVER... and all I have left of him recently is this Spongebob Blanket I'm covered with.

I used as much strength as I could to pull the blanket closer to me as if it were my father and I could just remember the day he brought it home for me.
"Callister, come to the kitchen please," My father called for me."I have a surprise for you.
My father was rarely seen by me since he was in the military. So when he was home I tried taking every piece of free time he had open. So when he called me to the kitchen, I came running like a little fat kid after the ice cream truck.
"Hey, my little rascal!" He smiled as he picked me up to sit me in the island high chairs and handed me a large pure white box.
He looked at me with so much pride,  so much joy,  so much happiness. This somehow made me happy as I smiled a wide toothy grin. With an assuring nod of his head I ripped the box completely open and my body and mind went into a complete shock as I seen the giant sewn picture of my most favorited childhood cartoon characters; Spongebob Squarepants, Patrick Star, Squidward Tentacles, Mr. Krabs and the rest of the Bikini Bottom gang.
I wanted to scream and jump around all over my dad and thank him with hugs and kisses, but he'd beat me to the punch with a great hug and forehead kiss of his own.
"Don't get too excited yet Rascal." He stated, a sleek smile on his face. "Unfold the blanket son." He continued saying and so I did.
I was only 6 at the time and though I could read well, I still had a few problems.
"Can you read that for me?" My father questioned.
I tried my best to sound out the words.
"I l...love yow...you... very.. m...m...much s..son. Just... l...like... bik...biki...bikini bottom loves a k..kra...krabby patty!"
I was entangled in another wrap of arms followed by the voice of my father. "That was so good Callister." He exclaimed.  "Now look Callister. You're mom told me you have trouble sleeping in the dark sometimes. That's
why I bought you this magical blanket."
"Magical Blanket?" I replied questionably. "How can a blanket be Magical?"
"NEVER!" My father laughed in what I now realize was extreme sarcasm. "This blanket is extremely powerful." He continued. "But it will only work for you. And only if you keep it a secret. Can you keep a secret Cali?"
I nodded very excited and enthusiastically, the snag-a-tooth grin spread more wider than before.
"Okay," my father winked. "Listen up because I can only tell you this once."
"DADDY!" I whined impatiently.
"Okay,Okay!" He sighed happily. "Now, I bought this blanket from an young Gypsy woman in Iraq. She was a gorgeous woman. She had frosty green eyes, long golden hair, fair clear skin and the most gentle touch ever."
"She sounds a little like mommy!" I interrupted.
"Yes Callister," He laughed. "She sounds very much like mommy, doesn't she?" He continued. "But anyway, she asked me if I had a son.  I told her I have the best and most wonderful son in the world...  But his mother told me he has a little scared of the dark problem. She then smiled her beautiful smile and said wait here. I did and 30 minutes later she came back with this exact blanket. She told me it was made especially for you and that its power were to give you the sweetest dreams and to guard you from an evil or bogeyman that may be lurking around. She said with this blanket you are untouchable."

The tears began to well from my eyes again after the reminisce. It was so vivid, so whole, so close... Like it just happened 5 minutes ago and I was just 6 years old...

But I'm not six years old anymore...  It didn't happen 5 minutes ago.  It happened years ago and my dad isn't here any longer.

I thought and hoped my eyes would be all dried out now. I'm so tired of crying, but I can't control it. It's just so surreal

It's like one minute this all feels like a dream... A figment of my imagination. The next minute, reality slams right in my face and I can tell that this is real life. That everything I've been going through is just as real as the the scars and bruises that they are broadly creating.

And to make it even worse, fates cruelty of jokes is making me live each and every grueling moment that has happened in the past few weeks in my head. From the beginning of it starting with Princeton and his unheartedly cruel joke, to meeting these two beautiful strangers in the woods and actually falling in love with one of them... Only to have him break my heart so many times and now he's here again, combing his fingers through my hair and comforting me. He probably just feels bad.

Then there's the thoughts of my fathers passing and how I'm basically going shit house crazy. I know this isn't normal teenage life. This is pure adulterated drama here and I'm the movie star.