Jeon Jungkook is a mistake, a disappointment, a disgrace. This he knows. He knows that what he is now is because of his stupidity from the past because that's how it works right? And there's no way he can lift himself up, make up for all the mistakes he made because, hell, how? How can he fix himself? How can he make up for dropping out of high school for some idiot? How can give his children a better life? How can he give himself a better life? How can he form a better relationship with his family? How can he leave this raggedy and shady apartment? How can he do anything but watch his life flake away piece by piece?
Really, there's no answer. It's easy for some but some only hit rock bottom, Jungkook is underneath the rocks. Stuck. Barely able to breathe. The only sunlight or happiness in his life are the two beings he wishes he can fix himself for, the two beings that'll love him more than anything for now and hopefully forever. Jungkook can only hope that they'll forgive him for bringing them into a life not worth living.
There are times when Jungkook looks at his two young children and he feels absolutely, utterly sorry for them. Kang Hanbin, who he couldn't even afford to change the surname of, raised by a child as Jungkook was only sixteen when he had him and Jeon Chanwoo - both being raised by a man that only makes roughly $19-20 thousand a year when he works overtime, right at the poverty line and hardly get them the things they want and need. Both exposed to the horrors the law enforcement doesn't necessarily care about since all men should be able to stand up for themselves: domestic violence. Of course, the kids were never harmed physically unless it was an unintentional jerk of the arm or a shove but they were never smacked, punched, or verbal violence. Though Jungkook believes his oldest, Hanbin, is possibly suffering from PTSD as the boy reacts to anything violent whether discipline or on TV in a way a child really shouldn't and Chanwoo's eyes have seen more than that of a three-year-old.
So not only is Jeon Jungkook a disappointment to everyone he's known, but he's also a terrible parent by allowing his children, people who he silently promised to protect for the rest of their lives, to be exposed to traumatic experiences. There may be no such thing as a perfect parent, Jungkook knows this, but there are terrible parents and Jungkook falls in that category.
It's all Jungkook can do to try and reshape their lives, force happier memories into their minds in hopes that they'll move on from their pasts. Chanwoo was only one, he shouldn't be able to remember but Hanbin saw it from ages two to four, it's implanted in his mind.
Jungkook's past will forever be with him from when he dropped out of the school, the disappointed expressions belonging his parents, the confused look of his younger brother whom he tried to be a role model for - some role model he is - to the day his ex-fiance, the person who promised to love and respect him, the first day the abuse started.
Jungkook makes many mistakes so much so to where he is a mistake and nothing more.
---
Jungkook resisted the urge to yawn as he brewed coffee for a waiting customer. The man had been rude to him and Jungkook was tempted to spit in his drink but that would be very unprofessional so instead, he ignored his bitterness towards the man and finished his order. Karma will bite the customer in the ass anyway. The young man was ready to go home, having already been on his feet for three hours and still had six more to go. Jungkook had been up all night with his youngest son who had caught a godforsaken stomach bug, the poor tot was throwing up all night and whining, whining, whining, wanting Jungkook's attention even when he was asleep. When the brunette was able to get some shut-eye his alarm blared only two hours later and he could only snooze for five minutes. So you can't blame him for feeling a bit bitter today.
"Here you go sir, have a nice day," Jungkook said, plastering a smile on his face.
The man scoffed and jerked the cup out of Jungkook's hand, some of the hot liquid splashing onto his fat hand. The man hissed and it took all of Jungkook's willpower not to laugh. The man looked at him with a scowl and before rushing towards the door. Jungkook sighed and looked at the clock, time was going by so slowly. His break was in two hours but he didn't care, he just wanted to go home and sleep.
He felt bad for leaving his son while the poor boy is sick but he couldn't afford to miss any days. Getting away from him was hard, he almost lost his neck, because all the little one wanted was Jungkook but Jungkook couldn't stay.
"Excuse me?" A girl said, waving her hand around a bit to get the brunette's attention.
"Oh, I'm sorry," Jungkook said, shaking his head, "how may I help you?"
"I haven't been to this cafe, what do you recommend?" The girl said, squinting in thought as she stared up the menu. Jungkook recognized her almost immediately as an actress and, wanting the tip, he quickly spoke out his recommendations in a sweet voice: "for drinks I recommend the raspberry cheesecake milkshake or the regular cheesecake frappuccino with caramel and for food, I recommend funnel cake or the cookie-brownie cake it has peanut butter in it though if you're allergic..."
The actress hummed before nodding, "I'll take all that besides the funnel cake and the double the brownie thing, please."
Jungkook nodded and read the order aloud before telling her her due, "what table will you be sitting at?"
"Um..." She leaned over before saying, "table seven in the corner."
The brunette nodded before turning and began the order. His thoughts switched back to his son and he pouted, wishing he could call the babysitter and ask how he was doing. He hated leaving his kids when they're sick but he also wanted to have money to pay for their medicine and doctor visits. But still, Chanwoo's cries for him to stay made his heart hurt.
Once Jungkook finished the order, he placed the food and drinks on a tray before carefully walking towards table seven. He placed the tray on the table, received his generous tip which he immediately pocketed, and wished her and her husband a good day before walking back towards the register.
His eyes landed on yet another well-known person. He began to wonder how many celebrities he was going to see today. This man was close to Korea's it-man/visual. Jungkook's eyes and man's eyes connected and he quickly looked away, walking towards the other register before his coworker said,
"Jungkook, fix this order please and thank you."
He handed the young man the receipt and Jungkook scanned through it. The man, also known as Park Bogum, had ordered a Cinnamon Shortbread Frappucino, a Cherry Mocha and a small chocolate milkshake.
"Jungkook, clean the tables when you're done," he heard his manager say and sighed. 'Just six more hours. Just six more hours.'
"Yes, sir," Jungkook walking towards the counter where the man was standing.
"Here you go, sir, have a nice day," he said, sitting the drinks on the table. He lingered, hoping for a small tip but all he received was a mock sigh and a, "if only you were faster."
Jungkook's face almost dropped and he mentally sighed and kept his smile, "I apologize for the wait, sir-"
"Make me another frappuccino, this one tastes like shit. I don't expect much from the lower class but I, at least, expect you know how to make q decent drink," Park Bogum said, shoving the drink back into Jungkook's hands, "and hurry up this time."
Low blow but one he's used to. "I apo-"
"Are we having a problem here?" His manager said, showing up beside the young man and looking up at the customer.
"Just a tiny one," the brunette said, "I'll go make you a new coffee."
Park Bogum hummed as he pulled his phone out to answer a call. Jungkook hurriedly remade the man's coffee before turning around and rushing towards the counter. He gave the man a small smile before saying almost mechanically, "here you go sir, I'm sorry for the wait."
The model said nothing as he grabbed the drink tray off the counter and turned to walk away. Jungkook groaned in his head before walking towards the back to start cleaning the tables. He was ready to go home and hopefully take recharge, days like this are the worse.
'Just six more hours'
---
Word Count: 1512
-|ongoing|-
|'19-'20|
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Fanfic[Stuck in a weird state of ongoing and completed] Pregnant at sixteen by his rich model boyfriend, Jeon Jungkook left his home to live the life of luxury and #noworries with his then loving boyfriend. However, things took a turn when his boyfriend g...
