Read It And Weep (Anthony Rizzo)

Fifty~ Thinking Of You

Hannah

I return to Chicago feeing pretty refreshed from my time away form the city not for once. I got some things off my chest and I got to spend a good amount of time in the sun. I was feeling refreshed heading into the heart of the Blackhawks and Bears season. So I head to my office on this nice fall day with a smile on my face, business was good, life was good. I was ready to take on the world.

Once I sit down I crack down on the Blackhawks beat I was on. I play music softly in my cubical as I work to myself. I get a lot done unbothered by a lot of things around me. Everyone in here works hard and they get to do their own thing. We have our own ideas but we usually share our thoughts and approach all the different angles of a story. It was a nice process we have here and so far people love it.

The song on my phone changed and I smile to myself. I always loved music and Whitney Houston was one of my favorites. She has a voice of a angel and her lyrics were so heart felt. It was hard not to like her.

"A few stolen moments is all that we share
You've got your family and they need you there
Though I've tried to resist being last on your list
But no other man's gonna do
So I'm saving all my love for you

It's not very easy living all alone
My friends try and tell me find a man of my own
But each time I try I just break down and cry
'Cause I'd rather be home feeling blue
So I'm saving all my love for you."

I tap my pen on my the desk to the beat as I start to drift off in my head again. I see a picture of my family and Anthony at dinner on my birthday hanging on the wall next to me. I smile because it sucks that I miss Anthony as much as I do. I shouldn't miss him like this but I can't help it. He needs to be with his family and I was needed here. The moments we had together were stolen but I keep them dear to my heart. I look at the picture and smile because we all looked so happy, because we were. Although I hate birthdays I love my family. And I love Anthony no matter how much it scared me to admit it.

"You used to tell me we'd run away together
Love gives you the right to be free
You said be patient just wait a little longer
But that's just an old fantasy

I've got to get ready just a few minutes more
Gonna get that old feeling when you walk through that door
'Cause tonight is the night for feeling alright
We'll be making love the whole night through
So I'm saving all my love for you

Yes, I'm saving all my love
Yes, I'm saving all my love for you
No other woman is gonna love you more
'Cause tonight is the night that I'm feeling alright
We'll be making love the whole night through
So I'm saving all my love

Yeah, I'm saving all my lovin'
Yes, I'm saving all my love for you
For you
For you."

Not a second later I see my phone buzz and "Tony the Terminator" pops up on my phone. That's the last time I let him see my phone when he asks. Though this is a step up from "Anthony the King of the Galaxy" because that name was just stupid.

Hey Hannah! I was just thinking of you and wanted to let you know that I read your new article and it was great as always. Keep up the good work!

I smile to myself as I pick up my phone. I type something out before tossing my phone to the side and trying to focus on my work again.

Thank you Anthony. Means a lot coming from you! How have you been? I know your parents had a lot planned with you, I hope you can get to spend some time with them.

I try to focus on my work but I keep looking at my phone, waiting for him to text back. So I stay glued to my phone waiting for it to buzz again, like my life depended on it.

I'm doing pretty good. I already miss you but I saw that coming. The parents and I are getting ready for thanksgiving so it's keeping us busy. We would love it if you and your family could make it out here. Plus I would love to see you again before December. That seems too far away.

I finally close my laptop once I realized the path I was on wasn't a productive one. My emotions weren't going to stay where I need them so I might as well not fight them. I stare at my phone as I think about what to say. Think about trying to go see him again but knowing I had stuff to here. But my heart was with him and who am I without my heart? Who am I without him? Some scary thoughts but unfortunately there wasn't much I could do right now.

I don't think I can leave again with so much work needed to be done here. I would love to be back in Florida with you, but unfortunately there's people here who need me too. But I don't see why we can't hold a get together with your family and mine when you get back though. My grandparents would love to meet your parents and maybe we can make our own Christmas traditions.

After sitting in my chair for a little I decide I should probably go home and pack. I was going to be in Colorado for a Hawks game and I haven't even gotten my suitcase unpacked from Florida yet. So I call it a day and say goodbye to everyone at work. Once I was sure everyone had what they needed I head to my lonely apartment.

I feel my phone vibrate and I smile because I knew it was him. And that's the only person I wanted to talk to right now.

I think that's a wonderful idea. They'll be up for the hospital visit then we can come over and make Christmas cookies or go caroling or something fun.

That sounds wonderful, I can't wait!

Sounds like a plan. I'll let you be for a while because I know you're busy like always. I'll talk to you soon.

I'll be waiting.

I fall back in my bed as my phone gets tossed next to me. I let out a long sigh because my life never seems to slow down, it's always one thing after another. And while it can be a lot I wouldn't change a damn thing.