Miracles + Chances

CHAPTER ONE

CHAPTER ONE

"Jane, dear, wake up. You need to take your medicine then you can get back to sleep after."

I heard my father open the medicine cabinet right side of the room. I tried to get up so I could sit down and did some stretching. Mornings like these aren't easy because of the fact that you could feel the pain in every part of your body. I could feel how much it hurts and yet I am thankful because pain means I am alive. Pain sometimes is a good sign that you are still alive.

I took the tablets that were already laid on the silver plate on my table where my father placed them, and drank the water that had been there since I got myself to bed last night. My father watched every detail of my actions and right after that I heard him sigh...
"How are you feeling?"
"Grand."
"Oh."
"Come on dad. I'm fine. You better take a rest."
"Well, alright. I'll always be here when you need something."
"Thank you, dad." I waited for him to close the door and then tried to get myself back to sleep. A moment later, I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling. It's been a month since I'd last seen him. And within that one month, a lot of things already happened to me.
It was one early morning on the third of June, and Maya, my best friend left a dozen of messages from my phone saying I need to go see our aunt, Doctor Louis who is currently working at our town's Health Care Centre. I had been experiencing a lot of weird things since my sophomore year back at high school. Maya is the only one who witnessed all of it. And now, I couldn't think of any excuses anymore from her. She had contacted almost all of our friends here in town just to accompany me to go. Jake and Mitch ended up being the ones to accompany me that time. And since that day, my life had changed.

Medical check-ups, complete blood counts, immunophenotyping, FISH, flow cytometry, etc. were conducted on me. And now I'm here in bed, lying down almost every day. I can't do anything. I can't change anything. My life turned out into something I never thought it would be; something I never wished for, yet something that has given me a lesson to learn unto.

"Jane?" I suddenly got myself out from daydreaming again, and turned to face him on my left.

"Jane, my love, how are you feeling?" my father asked me for the nth time. I sighed and smiled. He smiled back.

"William called a while ago. He asked me if you're already awake. I came in to make sure if you're still asleep"

"Father, tell him I'm fine. Tell him to call my number." He looked down on the floor and answered after another sigh, "Very well, I should go then."
"Thank you, dad." I whispered while he closes the door quietly.

William is my long distance boyfriend for almost three years. He just graduated two months ago and he's in the middle of reviewing for his upcoming board examination on September. William, my darling love, poor man, lost and depressed with all my cancer and everything, has already decided to come home and spend a couple of days with me. I feel so happy and guilty at the same time... happy because of the fact that I'm going to be seeing him again, and guilty for making him skip his reviewing sessions just to see me.
"Jane."
"William." I waited for him to answer, but all I could hear were sighs and sobs. I sighed back at him, as I try to control my tears from coming out.
"I missed you, love." He murmured with a deep sigh. I sighed again and thought of what to say back.

"I missed you too. It's okay not to do this, Will. I'm doing well. I-"
"I'll see you tomorrow. You better get some sleep. I love you, so much."
"I guess I better get going. See you then."

I lied about going to sleep though, not because I don't want to talk to him... but I just got out of words to say to him. I just stared at the ceiling, watching the stars pasted on it as I try to count them, and pretended that they were real as I whisper my wishes through them.

It truly is that life is not a wish granting factory.