The Rise of Lydia Rowe ↠ Jasper Hale (ON HOLD)

[1.14] healing

"IT FELT SO REAL," Lydia murmured, staring at the carpeted floor of Dr. Evans. "It was like I was back in that room all over again."

"And how did that make you feel, when you woke up?" Dr. Evans asked her.

Lydia swallowed hard against the persistent lump in her throat. "Scared. Hopeless. I thought everything that's happened since that night was all just a dream, and I was still in the middle of it."

"Do you still feel that way? Like you're still in the middle of it?"

Lydia considered the question for a moment. "No," she finally answered. "It feels over. It is over, and I know that. But sometimes it just... feels like it'll never stop haunting me."

"You went through a traumatic experience, Lydia," Dr. Evans said softly. "Unfortunately, the emotions and fears those types of experiences cause often don't go away for a long time—if they ever do." She paused, jotting something down in her notebook. "You said you were having a sleepover with your friend when it happened?"

Lydia nodded. "Gwen. She's... she's great. She went through something similar."

Dr. Evans nodded, understanding what Lydia meant. "Do you two talk about it?"

"A little in the beginning," Lydia told her. "She gets it, you know? She understands."

Dr. Evans smiled. "That's good. Sometimes finding support from other survivors goes a long way in helping cope with the trauma."

Lydia nodded, idly picking at the hem of her jeans. "Uh, can I ask you something?"

"Of course," Dr. Evans said. "That's why I'm here, Lydia."

Lydia bit the inside of her cheek, wondering how to word her question. "Do you think... Is it too... too soon to think about dating again?" It felt like a silly question, but Dr. Evans would never judge her or make fun of her—she was far too professional and kind for that.

"That's entirely up to you, Lydia," Dr. Evans answered.

"But is there, like, an average? Like an average amount of time between the... the incident and... dating again?"

Dr. Evans paused for a moment, likely gathering her thoughts. "Every survivor is different," she told Lydia. "Some begin dating a few days after, others can't bear to be intimate with anyone for well over a year after. There's multiple factors to consider." She looked at Lydia for a moment. "Is there a certain person you have in mind?"

Lydia felt her cheeks heat up. "There's, uh... There's a guy, at my school. He's really sweet, and Gwen is sure he likes me, and I... I like him, too."

"How do you feel when you're around him?" Dr. Evans asked.

"Happy," she said softly. "He makes me feel like the world isn't so heavy. Like... Like I could really fall in love with him." She paused, fiddling with her sleeves. "I never really felt that way with Justin. But Jasper, he's... he's different."

"A good different?" Dr. Evans asked.

Lydia nodded, unable to keep from smiling. "Yeah. A really good different."

"Do you trust him?" Dr. Evans asked her.

Lydia thought about it for a moment. "Yeah," she answered. "I think... I think I do."

"If you think you're ready," Dr. Evans said, "and you think he's the right guy, I don't see why you shouldn't date him. This could be a really good step for you, Lydia."

"You think so?" Lydia asked.

Dr. Evans smiled warmly. "Yes. Do what you're comfortable with. You can tell him what happened or not, that's up to you. It's your story to tell, Lydia. But it isn't the only story you have. Don't forget that."