Beneath Your Beautiful (H.S. AU)

Chapter 37

The coldness of his absence sent shivers down my spine and goosebumps arose on my skin. I lifted my head from the pillow and put the comforter aside wondering where he'd gone.

"Go back to bed." His voice seemed cold as he slid on his boots, and I gave him a confused glare unaware of what was going on.

"Harry, no. What's going on?" I quickly got on my feet and walked over to him.

He licked his lips and stared down at me, as if the events of last night hadn't taken place, and I was this complete stranger to him. "I need to leave," he apologized and my eyes grew wide.

"No. Cmon. Come back in bed."

"I can't," he complained while his voice broke, and he seemed to be fighting himself not to start crying. The room temperature seemed to drop drastically, and I hugged myself trying to keep myself warm as Harry's t-shirt I had used to sleep in wasn't doing the job, however I knew only one thing could change the coldness - only one person.

"Of course you can cmon," I tried to smile but failed realizing that this was much more serious than I had first thought.

"I can't, I can't do this," he muttered, eyes teary and my lips started trembling.

"Don't be like this, Harry." My eyes were watery, and I was certain I knew what direction this conversation would take, I wouldn't like the ending. He ranked a hand through his hair and looked at me with an empty stare. "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"No. Don't you dare. Don't you dare do this!" I was getting furious knowing exactly what he was saying.

"We can't do this, Trin. I'm not good for you."

"Don't give me that bullshit. Don't make this decision for me. I need you!" I screamed taking a step forward, but he quickly backed away and the tears that had built up in my eyes started to fall.

"It's true. I'm not. Please listen to me for once." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and bit his bottom lip.

"We've already discussed this. Harry, I want you. I don't care about yesterday or any of it for that matter, I just want you. I love you," I cried feeling like I was suffocating. All oxygen seemed to have left the room, and there was no way I would make it out alive.

"I'm sorry, love. But this needs to end before things get worse. I don't want you to get hurt." His eyes were watery, but that didn't matter in the moment. I was mad.

"Don't call me that!" I screamed, my voice broken.

"I'm sorry," he apologized making me want to hit him hard and knock some sense into him.

"You leave me the morning after having sex with me, and you can't even man up and give me a proper goodbye or an explanation. I guess it's true what people say about you. You are that kind of guy," I screamed knowing I was being unreasonable but he was hurting me worse than everyone ever had before.

"I am," he said agreeing with me not even trying to defend himself. For some reason, I wanted to defend him for him, yet I didn't think it'd change his mind. He wasn't like that. At least as far as I knew not anymore, but hearing him say all these things somehow told me otherwise.

"You-" I didn't even know what to call him. I was hurt and frustrated, completely broken, and I just needed him to tell me that everything would be okay. That we would be okay.

"You'll get through this."

"Don't fucking say that. Do you have any idea how much this hurts! I told you I couldn't lose you. I told you, I loved you. I reached out for you when no one else would, and you give me this crap! I fucking slept with you, Harry. I gave you everything. I told you everything. And for what? So you could just rip out my heart and step all over it."