Badboy shadow

•31•

Annabelle and I travelled all the way back to the castle for packing my stuff and saying goodbye to the boys.

My heart dropped as the car entered the Campus.
As the car stopped I opened the door and entered the castle.

I hurried in my dorm and packed my few belongings. It was only for a while. For half a year or one. I couldn't tell yet.

It didn't took me an hour and my suitcases were packed.

With too suitcases I stumbled along the hallway and stopped infront of Jungkooks dorm.

I first hesitated but then knocked.
He opened and I could tell by his weird face expression that he was confused.

I sighed.
"I came to say goodbye..."

His eyes widened.
"What are you talking about?!"

I bit my upper lip.
"It will be for a while. Its... you dont understand. I know but... I will live at my uncle's house for a while."
I lied.

I prayed to god that he wouldn't recognize that I was lying to him.

He just eyed my face and then slightly nod.
"I will miss you. But I guess it's for the best. You need space. I understand."
He hugged me tightly and I could hear him sniffle.

"Kookie... are you crying?!"
I asked.

He kept silent.

I felt so guilty for leaving and lying but it was for the best.

I gently pulled myself out of the embrace to look at his face.

His eyes started watering and my heart couldn't handle it and I started crying too.

We just stood there crying our hearts out. We didnt knew what to do or say.

"Jungkook it won't be forever. I'll may be back when you guys finished the tour."
I tried cheering him up.

He forced to smile.

"I'm just afraid of losing you."
He whispered.

I shook my head imidiatly.
"We will stay in contact! I SWEAR!"

His eyes lightened.

"Pinky promise?"

I giggled and reached out my pinky finger.
"Promise."
I replied.

"I... have to go now... I haven't said goodbye to the rest yet."

"Lee...!"
He interrupted.

"Will you tell Taeyhung?!"
He slightly asked.

I looked down at my feet.
"I... I dont think so..."
I stuttered.

"No problem... I can do this for you."

I looked up and smiled.
"Really?! Thank you so much!"

I ran towards him and gave him a last tight hug until I went to tell the others.

------------half an hour later

I never saw all of the boys upset at the same time. But I had to remember myself over and over again that it was for the best.

I looked back at the castle one last time as I turned around to head for the car.

The chauffeur helped me with my suitcases and smiled encouraging.

I forced a smile back and got into the car.

As we drove off many feelings overwhelmed me.
The feeling of loneliness, sadness, excitement but also disappointment of myself.

I watched the castle slowly fading away.

I took out my headphones to cheer myself up a bit. As the car suddenly slowed down sharply.

I looked up to see what had happened.
A tall boy on his bike blocked our way and brought himself into danger.

I shook my head.
Didnt he just realised what he was doing?!

The boy turned around and my heart just stopped for a moment.

Taeyhung?!
I jumped out of the car.

"What are you doing?! You could be dead now!"
I yelled.

Taeyhung jumped off his bike and ran towards me.

"Lee... dont leave!"
He gasped under his heavy breath.

I looked down.
"I have to."
I mumbled.

He shook his head.
"Lee listen to me, I could tell you my part of the story and we...we can make it together! All would be the same as it was!!!"
His hands were shaking.

He grabbed my shoulders and shook me gently.

"Please dont go... "
He said over and over again.

"Tae... it's not how life works."
I mumbled.

His face fell from hope to disappointment.

"Lee... I love you and there is noone else! I swear! Just let me explain one last time before you decide whether to leave or stay!"
He stumbled over his own words.
He must had been nervous.

"I'm sorry tae..."

My fingers tightened around the car doorknob.

But before I could open the door he grabbed me by my waist forcing me to look into his face.

I felt a strong sting inside of my body and then nothing.
Usually my heart would speed up and butterflies would spread out but now I didnt feel anything.

My feelings for Taeyhung faded away.

"Taeyhung. I have to go now."
I mumbled under my cold breath.

He shook his head and grabbed my face between his hand palms.
And still- I felt nothing.

"Taeyhung..."

He pressed his lips onto mine.
I wondered if this would break the ice around my heart but it didnt.

I gently pushed him away and turned around to open the door.

"It was nice... being.. in your life... well at least for while."
I mumbled and entered the car.

I closed the door and the car drove off.

In the reflection of the mirror I could see Taeyhungs fragile figure slumping onto the ground and slowly fading away.

But I felt simply nothing.