Ziall-One Shots

What Hurts The Most

Tumblr prompt: Zayn is in love with Niall (Nobody knows), and gets really, REALLY jealous cause Niall likes Liam and he know Liam likes him back :D

Sorry if it's bad but I hope you like it :)!

Loves supposed to be this beautiful thing, It's supposed to be a special connection that you and your partner share together. Stories and films they make it out to be some easy ride, You fall inlove, you tell the person how you feel, Then you end up living happily ever after, But life it's no fairy tail. Life dosen't always work out how you want it to. In stories your told all about how love is so beautiful and special, But your never told about the pain. When you fall inlove with a person there's no guarantee that there going to love you back. I know this because I'm experiencing it, The person I love has no idea of my real feelings, How can I tell him? How can I tell him that he means more to me then life itself? How can I tell him that he's the reason my heart beats? How do I tell him that since the first day I saw him I fell inlove? How do I tell my best friend that I love him? 

Niall he's my world. Everything about him just draws me in, If I had to list the things I love about him I'd say his eyes are as blue as the ocean, His hair is soft and gentle, The way it tickles your neck when he buries his head in the crock of your neck. His laugh is contagious, When he laughs the whole world wants to laugh with him. His beautiful smile, He hates smiling with his teeth but I love it when he does. His carefree attitude towards life, He looks at everything like it's an adventure. Niall has the biggest heart in the world, He has so much love to give, But I know I'm never going to be enough for him. 

People think they know suffering, They think they know what's it's like to crave something every second of the day, To wake up and feel emptiness inside, Pain dosen't have to be physical it can be mental and emotional to. Suffering for me is knowing I can never hold Niall in my arms. I can never know what's it's like to wake up to his beautiful face. I can never kiss his soft pink lips and know exactly what they taste like. I will never be able to tell him I love him without him thinking I'm meaning it as just a friend. I have to wake up everyday and watch Niall love somebody else, Someone who's not me, That somebody is Liam Payne. Nobody knows of my feelings for Niall, But everybody knows about Liam and Niall's love for eachother. The true meaning of suffering is hiding your love for somebody who will never love you back.

"Zayn can I talk to you?" Niall asked as he made his way into my bedroom, I looked up from my diary before nodding my head. 

"Course Nialler, What's up?" I asked as I put my diary to one side. 

"Have you been crying?" Niall asked concern filling his voice. 

"Of course not, I just got some hairspray in my eyes that's all" I replied, Niall nodded before sitting down.

"Zayn I need some advice, See tonight me and Liam are spending time together, I want to tell him how I feel, But I don't know how" Niall explained, My heart shattered all over again. 

"I- I think you should talk to Harry or Lou about this Ni" I whispered as I avoided his gaze. 

"But I want to talk to you Zi, Your the one I trust with my life" Niall exclaimed, I sighed trying desperately to avoid his gaze. 

"I'm sorry Ni, I just can't" I stated before standing up and going to leave the room, Niall however grabbed my arm.

"Where are you going!" He asked.

"Niall let go" I mumbled.

"No! What's wrong with you Zayn?!" Niall asked sternly.

"Just let me go Ni!" I whispered blinking back my tears.

"Not until you tell me what's wrong" He stated, I don't know why maybe all my emotions took me over, Maybe my heart had taken enough hurt, I don't fully understand why but I just snapped. 

"You and Liam is what's up!" I yelled taking Niall by surprise, Niall's eyes widened.

"W-What do you mean?" He asked confused. 

"You and Liam, Niall! Your all over eachother all the fucking time! Do you have any idea how that makes me feel!" I yelled finally allowing my tears to fall. 

"I don't understand" Niall stated, I screamed in frustration. "Zayn your scaring me" Niall whispered.

"I can't watch you and Liam together, I can't watch you two be happy, I can't see you in his arms everyday knowing he's the reason you smile, Because your the reason I smile Niall! You've taken my heart and you don't even realize that you've done it" I cried out, Niall gulped.

"What do you mean Zayn?" He whispered, I closed my eyes.

"I love you ok, I know I shouldn't but I do, I love you so much Niall, I've loved you since the first time I laid eyes on you, But I know I'm not good enough for you, And I don't deserve you, But I can't stay here and watch you be with him, I know that I have to let you go no matter how much it kills me" I stated more tears falling from my eyes. Niall shook his head before pulling me into a hug, I cried into his chest as I finally let all my emotions out, That night Niall he didn't go to Liam, He stayed with me, Maybe just maybe there's hope for us after all.