the truth will out

10. The Statement

I feel it before I've even opened my eyes, the throbbing pain starting at one temple and stretching right across my head to the other. I groan stretching my legs and sit up, eyes still shut. I feel the urge rising as I squint my eyes through the sun shining down on my face.
I shoot up and run upstairs only just making it to the toilet before throwing up all the pizza and wine from last night. I groan again as I wash my hands and splash my face with cold water. I walk through to the bed, barely opening my eyes, and climb into the cool sheets, falling asleep immediately.

I'm awoken three hours later by Norman barking loudly downstairs, I slowly trudge down the stairs and towards the front door.
"hi miss"
"hi?" I mutter, my voice a hoarse whisper.
"I have a delivery for miss Aniston" he holds up a huge bouquet of flowers.
"oh" I take the bright flowers, before signing for them and shutting the door. Carrying them to the kitchen island I take out the card placed in a yellow rose.
"dear jen, were sorry about everything happening right now, message us if you need anything, we love you. From Andrea, courteney and Kristin xx"
I blink away the tears, smiling to myself. I look over at the clock to see that it's almost 11 meaning I've really slept in.
I change into a sports bra and leggings and force myself to do the yoga, determined to keep my morning routine.
It took me over an hour, forgetting about everything for a while, just focusing on my breathing.

I walk into the living room after a nice cool shower, dressed in a bright blue, strapless dress with a brown leather belt. I notice my phone flashing over on the coffee table to see two missed calls from no other than brad.
I groan knowing it'll be about the pictures and that I'll have to ring him back.
I sit down on one of the bar stools, holding my phone, trying to plan what I'm going to say to him. I write a mini script in my head on how I hope the phone call will go before dialing his number. However as soon as I hear him answer I freeze, forgetting everything I'd planned to say.
"Hello? Hello?"
"err... hi its me" I say timidly, my heart pounding in my chest.
There's silence on the other end.
We both go to break it at the same time saying "how are you?" to be polite.
He replies saying he's fine and I reply with "I've been better" I know being cold with him is permitted seeing the circumstances of everything.
"look I'm sorry jen, I didn't mean for you or anyone to find out that way, really"
"oh so that's why you went to the secret beach where no one could see you?" I ask.
"we didn't see the cameras until it was too late, you know how easily they creep up on you. And I had actually planned to tell you sometime this week that we were gonna go public but we hadn't even fully spoken about it, we just knew it'd be soon"
"you've made me a laughing stock infront of the entire world, not just family and friends brad" I finally speak up.
"we haven't even announced that we're not together anymore and yet now the whole world knows you've left me for another woman. My dad knew before I did for fucks sake"
"jen I didn't mean for this to happen this way... I didn't mean for you to get hurt-"
"bullshit" I cut him off "you can't leave your wife for another woman then claim you didn't wanna hurt her. Common fucking sense brad, that would hurt anyone"
There's once again silence on the other line.
I sigh, "we need to make a statement and I'm writing it" I cut him off as he starts to talk "I'll send you an email of what I want out there and you can send it to our publicists or whatever. This phone call is done" I say hanging up and breathing deeply. My heart rate starts to slow down as my anger relents, just to be replaced with anxiety and embarrassment.

I sat at the kitchen island for almost half an hour, just staring at the computer screen. I have no idea what to write. I know it has to seem like it's coming from both of us and I need to make it seem like we're on good terms, which anyone with a brain would know we're not. Soon enough my fingers start gliding over the keyboard as I type out the short statement: we would like to announce that after seven years together we have decided to formally separate. For those of you who follow these sorts of things, we would like to explain that our separation is not the result of any of the speculation reported by the tabloid media. This decision is the result of much thoughtful consideration. We happily remain committed and caring friends with great love and admiration for one another.
I re-read it 20 times, trying to find any faults the media can make up a story about.
"great love and admiration".
The pain I feel reading those words feels out-of-body like. Almost as if the pain is so tiresome that now it's another person feeling the pain and I'm just watching from afar. I take a deep breath, preparing myself for my life changing once again forever, before clicking send. I take a deep breath.

I grab a glass of water and head over to the sofa but before I can even properly get comfortable my phone dings with the news of a notification. Then another. And another.
I look at it seeing all the texts and news notifications and before long the missed calls start coming in.
My eyes well up as I realise that there's no going back now, everyone knows.
I turn the sound off on the phone, turn it face down and lay on the couch, Norman coming to sit on my stomach, as I begin to cry for the hundredth time this week...

Hi, sorry I haven't updated in so long, Ive had alot to sort out but I'm going to try and write more frequently again ❤️