the truth will out

20. I'm Not Telling Her

Hi just a heads up this whole chapter will be brads pov just incase you get confused ❤️

Brad's pov
"I'm pregnant....."
I stare at angie for a good couple of minutes trying to figure out if this is just a joke she's playing but I can see in her eyes that it's not.
"bu-but how... When?" I don't want to believe this is happening right now.
"I don't know how" she mutters "but I found out yesterday and I know I'm not that far along at all" I see her staring fiercely at me out of the corner of my eye. "maybe it was a false positive" she says taking a step towards me.
I'm sat on the couch with a beer in my hand after a long day working on some scripts for plan b.
I knew something had to be wrong when she walked over and asked maddox to go play for a bit.
"look I know this is hard to wrap our heads around especially after everything that's happened with you and jennifer this year... It doesn't look good I'll admit that but-"
I groan as I realise how heart broken jen is going to be. Why do I constantly find a way to hurt her.
"angie if we are- I mean if you are pregnant I'll be happy of course.... I think. I mean I've known for a while that I want to start a family with you. But for jens sake I really hope we're not" I rub my hands over my face, resting my elbows on my knees as angie sits beside me.
"I know it'll be hard to see her ex moving on so quick but-"
"no you.. You don't get it" I cut her off.
"well then tell me what I'm not getting" she huffs. She's fiesty but I love it.

Flashback

I just got home from dinner with angie after we finished our scenes on set. I can't deny there's something between us and I know she feels it too but I'm trying to ignore it because I do still love jen so much and the last thing I want to do is hurt her.
I walk into our kitchen and place my coat on the counter as I fill a glass with water. I look over and next to my coat there's a small bottle of pills. I pick them up and read the label
"folic acid?" I mutter aloud to myself
"what-"
"hi baby" jen smiles as she walks into the kitchen. She's been home a while I see as she's already in her sweats and her hairs wet from the shower. She's been finishing alot earlier lately because it's the last season of friends so they have less tapings. The show finishes next year and I can tell jen is nervous about it so we avoid talking about it at all costs.
"what are these?" I ask holding out the pills.
"oh... Well I was talking to courteney about how we've still not managed to get pregnant yet-" my heart drops into my stomach "and she mentioned trying these to boost hormones or something, I don't know, so I picked some up...is that ok?"
I gulp before realising that I actually have to say something "yeah yeah i- uhm of course that's fine"
She smiles and moves forward to hug me. I know she desperately wants kids like we always talked about and starting a family between 2003-2004 but now with my new feelings for angie I feel so bad, but I can't tell her I don't want to have kids with her anymore. She'll start asking all sorts of questions and I really don't want to hurt her. I've thought over this so many times and I just can't bring myself to tell her. I have no idea what I'll do if jen actually does get pregnant, but from the results over the last few months it doesn't seem likely. We've had sex almost every night, she's tried different diets to help, she's tried so much stuff but it's just not happening. I'd hate to think that she can't get pregnant.
I'm pulled out of my thoughts as jen kisses my jaw because she can't reach my cheek and then walks into the living room, leaving me staring at where she was just stood...

End flashback

"brad...."
I know it's coming, I can feel it. The judgement.
"babe look at me" angie says again as she softly tilts my head towards her.
"you understand how wrong it was that you did that right?"
I look down again, nodding slightly. I know she's right and I am just embarrassed but I have a feeling it's coming off as if I just don't care.
"you tried to start a family with someone...whilst you were falling for someone else" I hear her voice get choked up and see she's welling up. She tells me that she feels really bad for jen and she now understands how much this will hurt her.
"I have a doctor coming round tomorrow to make it official. Are you going to be here?"
"i- of course I will" I stammer, shocked that she even asked.

The next day

I'm sat on the couch, pretty much exactly where I was yesterday, my knee jigging as I bite my nails, nervous of the outcome. I didn't get much sleep last night as I thought back to when me and jen where trying and all the times that she took that test and it came back negative.
The tears as she spoke about how confused she was that it wasn't happening and I just sat and watched, feeling so incredible guilty.

The doctor arrives and sets up, angies layed on the couch, her shirt pulled up as the doctor places the gell on her stomach.
"Bradley" I hear a small voice call from the other room.
"in a minute maddox I'm just doing something" I call back.
I hear him and zahara talking back and forth even though zahara is still too young to form words.
Angie got zahara before we were properly together so I'd only met her a few times on set.

"yep, you're pregnant" the doctors words pull me out of my thoughts.
My jaw drops.
"how- how far along?" angie asks looking from me to the doctor.
"only 3-4 weeks" he smiles and starts packing up.
Both me and angie take deep breaths as it just now sinks in what's happening.
We have to tell the kids. We have to tell family. We have to tell the world.

Once he's gone we sit on the sofa in silence.
"I'm not going to tell her" I finally mutter but I know angie heard and understood me.
"what why?" she's so shocked it's seems like anger.
"because when I told her about us at New years I literally watched her break down... I don't think I can see that again." I reply picking at my nails again. Most wives or girlfriends would hear that and immediately get angry and assume their partners are still thinking of their exes but not angelina.
"I know it's going to be hard brad. But if I was jen... Especially after you still tried for a family with her whilst everything was going on between us. Just think of how much more it would hurt coming from the tabloids and media. She deserves to know before the rest of the world know."
I know what angie means and I agree but I know I'm to much of a coward to see the pain in jens face again.
"I'll try and tell her at court when we finalise the divorce" I say, only half meaning it.
Angie sighs, I know she doesn't think that's a good idea but luckily she drops it and leaves to go play with maddox and zahara. This is such a mess...