One Thing On Top of the Other

Chapter One - August

I walked into the Public Academy for Performing Arts with my head held high. I had a slight sense of confidence and hope that I would finally hit the high marks, both academically and socially. Just like I had done for the past four years of my life.

The first week is always the easiest, a clean slate, a fresh start. I hadn't exactly hit the ground running my first year of high school, so I was determined to make up for it this year. My sophomore year.

I felt weird knowing that I was almost at the end of my childhood. It felt like I was finally going to be able to get a chance to spread my wings, but it also felt like I was losing my safety net to catch me if I happened to fall. I often feel smothered by my parents, like they've trapped me in a jar to try and keep me young forever. So while the other teens my age are already driving and working, I don't even have a phone. And I'm fifteen.

You're pathetic.

Oh, great! The voice is talking. My mind turned against me a long time ago.. Ever since eighth grade there has been this evil little voice inside of me that tells me I will never be enough. And I knew it was right.

I tried to tune the little voice out. Instead of listening to it, I focused on finding my friends. I think out of all my friends I missed Sandra the most. I spotted her almost immediately upon walking down the hall, and she did the same.

"Hey little bean! Oh my gosh you look so cute, how was your summer?"

I smiled. Sandra is always so sweet and upbeat, it's impossible to not like her. Her naturally curly black hair bounces up and down as she walks, and she always looks good without even having to try. It's a gift.

I proceeded to tell Sandra about numerous things that happened that summer, like my mundane summer school experience and my adventures with Lavontrae.

Lavontrae and I started dating last April, he had asked me out on my birthday. He had a crush on me for a very long time, and I became very drawn to him after awhile. He's so kind and sensitive, and he always shared his feelings with me.

I only told Sandra what we did, because I didn't want to get a bad reputation and because no one needed to know. I thought about telling Nykhia, but I didn't. I figured she'd start teasing us, and I did not want or need that.

Nykhia has a very electric type of personality. She has short, bright red hair and a chest that's hard not to notice. She's the type of girl who could love you to bits one minute and not acknowledge your existence the next. It bugged me a little, but I learned to live with it.

I wanted to get a chance to socialize with all of my friends, but I got to school a bit late that morning.

It took a couple weeks for me to get used to my schedule, but after a couple of weeks we finally got to work and I settled in. I went to school every day with hope that my sophomore year was going to be my best year ever.

I couldn't have been more wrong.