Tu Es Ma Lumière

60 - Exhaustion *Modern*

Mary Stuart leaned her head upon the door after it was shut and locked. She was exhausted, exhausted and blood sickened from over twenty one hours trying to save people so small and young. All the blood and the burns and the cuts and the bruises would be burned in her memory, she was sure of it. Over twenty one hours of desperation, trying to save so many small, tiny people. Sometimes it worked, sometimes it didn't.  She'd never forgive herself for the times that it didn't, she was sure of it.

But all of that blood, the blood of tiny people so young that they shouldn't have to be frightened of the end of their lives, cut too short all thanks to some faulty breaks on a school bus colliding with a truck.

Mary sniffled, wiping her tears that had fallen onto her cheeks. She had the easy job, if it could be considered that. All she had to do was keep their tiny little hearts beating. She didn't have to be one of the ones to tell the parents that those little hearts had stopped and couldn't be started up again.

She would forever remember the screams from one mother, the one who had fallen to the floor in such hysteria, screamed in a way that would forever curdle her blood as the was told that not one of her twins could be saved.

The blood. All that blood. The tiny, little body bags. The tiny sheets being placed over tinier bodies.

Her stomach lurched and she desperately sprinted into the kitchen, managing three hurls of her stomach, and a sob from her eyes and mouth. She sniffled, turning on the faucet, letting the spray run down the sink and take the contents of her stomach with it. She trembled, those grown men collapsing to the floor, those little girls so scared when they were taken into the hospital rooms. Wanting their mothers, so scared of death.

Mary cupped her hands together, collecting some cold water to drink some of it down, before dunking her face into the water. She sniffled, taking a nearby towel to dry her face. Mary tried her best to be quiet, not wanting to wake up the other three men that lived with her. She swallowed thickly, quickly pulling off her hospital uniform and putting it in the washing machine, covering herself with her old oversized dark blue sweater. Mary sprayed herself down with some anti-bac spray, before walking in the dark corridors of her pretty home.

Mary opened the white wood door, sighing with relief when the young boy inside of the room was still asleep in his crib. She knew she probably shouldn't, she should probably leave the little boy to his slumber, but she couldn't help it. The young little children, so scared, so little, so young, so bloodied. She needed to hold him.

Mary sat back in the overstuffed rocker, taking the little boy into her arms. He made a small noise, curled into her as she wrapped him up in his little blanket. Mary shushed him, ran her hands up and down his little back to keep him asleep. The child was so small, so sweet, so tiny.

Mary didn't know who Jean's mother was. Hell, she wasn't even entirely sure how she had met Sebastian and even less sure about how she had gotten together with Francis. Yet, she had. They had made a life together, a little family with each other. Apart from a few blips in the road, they were happy. 

Francis had provided her with respite and protection whilst she fought her forced marriage to Louis de Bourbon. Things had ended up ending messily, with Mary doing everything she physically could to try and prevent the marriage. Louis was dangerous, an international crime boss who wasn't to be messed with. She wouldn't say she was scared of Louis, but with his unhealthy obsession with her, she did not want to become such a man's wife.

She had found Francis and Bash and Jean, then. Hiding in some random building until Louis gave up on the marriage. But she had been found, and for fear of Louis harming her little family, Mary had had to go with him. Louis even convincing his insane brother Antoine to murder Mary's mother, the one who had signed Mary's name to the arranged marriage. Somehow, Mary had played the man at his own game, and had made house in southern France near the coast, Francis and Sebastian and Jean joining her after a few months.

She didn't know who Jean's mother was. Somewhere along the way, Mary got the impression that the nameless woman was either dead or didn't want the baby, making sure that Francis was the one to raise the child alone. When she had came into their lives, there was no mother in the picture. The child even called her 'maman' now, and Francis wasn't keen on stopping it. She had burst into his life, giving little Jean a mother, and he somebody to love. For Bash, she provided a friend and for all of them, financial security, for the woman was a rather established figure in the medical field.

She wasn't sure who Jean's mother was, if Francis loved her, or if she was even alive in this world anymore, but the woman's child did mean a hell of a lot to her. The woman's lover meant a hell of a lot to her, Mary not even managing to even imagine life without Bash -who was a dear, dear friend to her- Francis, or Jean.

Mary couldn't help but remember all those children. Those bloody, beaten children who screamed in such pain and such fear, wanting their mothers and fathers to make it okay, not strangers who desperately smiled at them and spoke in words they didn't understand. She saved as many as possible, but was well aware that she'd never, ever forgive herself for those poor little children that she couldn't save with her team.

She held Jean tighter to her, loose enough to keep him asleep, but tight enough to remind her that he was there, he was safe, he was alive.

"Hey," a voice said. Mary jumped, looked towards the now open doorway, saw her boyfriend standing there, looking deliciously dishevelled. "you just gettin' in?" he drawled, walking over towards his girlfriend and son.

"Yeah." Mary whispered, not wanting to wake the sleeping little boy in her arms. He was so tiny, barely a toddler. He looked just like Francis, Mary couldn't see one inch of another in this little boy's face.

"I heard what happened." he stated, sinking next to her. "All those little kids. Are you alright?" he asked.

Mary paused. "No." she whispered, getting up to put Jean back in his crib. Francis took his girlfriend's hand and walked her back to their bedroom. "All-all those little kids-" she stuttered, sniffling out the words. "they were so scared, Francis. I-I tried so hard to save them, but a couple-" she stuttered.

"Shh," he whispered. "I understand." he stated quietly, wrapping his girlfriend up in his arms. "It's alright." he stated. "It's over now."

~~

Once again, no idea what this is. I just have a weird liking to the idea of modern mary as a doctor, so there ya go! Dead Lola and Frary/Jean family! Hope you like it!

Please comment!

Stay safe,

keep your eyes pealed on this oneshot book and Frarytales!

love,

me,

:).