Bad At Love . KTH [Completed]

XXIX

Seoyoung's POV 

"Well that was quite the day," Taehyung said that night as he laid next to me in bed. I hummed in agreement, snuggling up to him under the blankets. 

"Yeah, it really was." We were quiet for a few moments, letting it all sink in. Taehyung had nearly died today, yet he didn't show any sign of it. That made me curious... Turning over in bed, I opened the drawer in the bedside table, drawing out a gun. It was a small Glock 17, one Taehyung gave me to keep in case anything happened. It was always loaded. Gently, I flipped over and placed the nozzle on the temple of his head. No reaction. None. Not even a flinch. 

"What are we doing now?" he drawled, a slight smile crossing his features. He thought it was funny. I sighed and drew the gun away. Taehyung turns over and takes the gun from my hands, turning the safety back on, making sure I don't accidentally shoot off my own head. I still didn't quite know how to use a gun. 

"How... How do you do that? How are you so strong and-and confident all the time?" I rambled, tracing lines on his chest that rose and fall. "I mean, you nearly died today, yet you stepped into that room and faced your attacker like it was nothing. I just put a gun to your head, but you weren't affected by it at all." It takes a while before Taehyung says anything, thinking about my question. 

"I don't really know," he whispered. "I've never really been scared of anything before." 

"Not even a gun?" He chuckled and laced his hand in my hair. 

"I mean, it was you who was holding it, so."

"What? I'm not scary?" He laughed and shook his head, giving me a kiss on the top of my head. 

"No no, you can be scary. Just not with a gun." I laughed, finding it ridiculous too. I didn't even know how to use one properly, much less have the guts to shoot someone. 

"But seriously, how do you do it?" His hand gently rubs my back as he thinks, for a long time. 

"It just doesn't matter I guess. A lot of things happen, but once I get past them, I kind of just leave it in the past. I mean, I almost died, but I didn't right? So what is there to be afraid of anymore? The crisis was averted, so it's only natural to move on. After doing that for almost my whole life, nothing is really scary anymore, you know?" I shook my head because, I didn't know. I've never been on the brink of death before. I've never had a murderer place a gun to my head. How would someone so inexperienced like me survive in this world? 

"But, are you scared of anything?"

"Well of course," he answers quickly. I frown. 

"But, what can you possibly be scared of? If death doesn't even frighten you, then what does?" 

"Well, for instance, losing you would be one. Any of my friends getting hurt as well. I'm afraid of being abandoned, especially by my loved ones." he said. "I'm scared of friends turning on me because of the things I do and say. I'm scared of hurting those I care about, and I'm afraid of being powerless."

"Powerless? Why?" Never had I had this much power before. Even more, I was longer a subordinate to my superiors in the hospital. Only when I married Taehyung did I really get a taste of real power. 

"Well, if I don't have power, those around me can get hurt. If something happens to them, and I don't have power or authority, I can't do anything to protect them." 

At this, a thought popped in my head."But... Isn't power what induces the need for protection in the first place?" I voiced. 

"What do you mean?"

"Well, if you didn't have all this power, no one would want to go after you or loved ones," I clarified. 

Taehyung is silent for a while, before saying, "Well, I've never thought about it like that before. Hey," Taehyung starts, propping himself on his elbow before continuing, "What would you say if I decided to let go of this power?" 

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, what if I gave up this life? Focused on Muse?" This question again. We had had this conversation before, and my opinion stands the same. 

"Well, I would be fine with that," My hand moves to his free hand, playing with his long fingers, "But if you don't make that change, I will be fine as well, Tae. Don't change for me. I will be fine no matter what. As long as you are by my side, I can take it all." At this, Taehyung smiles lovingly and finds his way to my lips, giving me a soft, passionate kiss. 

"I love you so much Seoyoung," he whispered, his lips still hovering millimetres away from my own.  

"I love you too," then, with a spontaneous boost of excitement, I pushed him down and flipped over to sit on top of him, stooping down to kiss him, my hands resting on his naked chest. "I'm sometimes grateful that you kidnapped me too." A smirk spreads across his face as his hands slide around my waist. 

"Really? Should we try it again?" 

"Hmm... How about I try it on you?" 

- 

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