If I'm on fire, you'll be made of ashes too.
JJ MAYBANK / FEM!OC
OBX SEASON 1
FIRST DRAFT ⸻ 05/08/20 → 07/17/20
EDITED ⸻ 02/09/23 → 04/19/23
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Pain had always been in Kathryn's heart. Nibbling softly, eating away at her life, piece by piece. As far as she can remember, it was there. Even before her dad died; the anger was there, and she knows why. She had always been a little too much like her mother.
Of course, the hurt and pain got worse during the four years she spent in London. She watched it grow – almost fed it. And then, the darkness swallowed her whole.
Sometimes, it scared her just how easy it had been. To make everything stop. How she felt so peaceful when she drifted off. How she had felt so desperate when she had woken up. How, she still thinks the world would be better off without her. Henry wouldn't have this burden. Max wouldn't have to put up with his boyfriend's niece. The Pogues would have never felt betrayed. Maybe even her mom would've been happy.
And the hurt would've stopped.
Kathryn slept for twelve hours. Almost a coma for her, considering she usually wakes up around seven, but she's grateful for it. She needed the rest, she had been exhausted, especially with the panic attack she had yesterday.
Her fingers trace the bandage on her wrist absentmindedly. She understands why he would have thought that. Even if... If it was pills... He knows her. He knows that, sometimes, she thinks about it.
But now, she's living with Henry. And she can't do it to him. She'd never do it to him.
She's startled when someone comes into her room – her door is open. Henry was pretty firm about it, he had to keep an eye on her. No locking it. She yanks her hand away and sits up.
Henry comes into her room with a tray. There's orange juice, hot chocolate and toast on it. It smells like forgiveness.
She narrows her eyes at him. "What's that?"
He sets the tray on her night table and sits next to her. "A 'sorry' tray."
She hums. "Max put you up to this, didn't he?" Darcys aren't very good at saying sorry. In exchange, they always mean it.
"I plead guilty," says Max as he comes in.
He sits on the other side of her, and she's stuck between the two overgrown men. She squirms a little, but stays put, finding that she doesn't mind their presence all that much. They always were an exception anyway.
