Boku No Hero Academia One Shots [Book 2]

Katsuki Bakugou

Requested by: SheBunnies18

Trigger Warnings: Depression/Anxiety, Bullying, Body Dysmorphic Disorder.

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You were in dire straits, worrying incessantly about the upcoming field trip. Of course, you weren't willing to experiment with such humiliation and pain, so you had informed Mr Aizawa of your planned absence. There was a brief, but fruitless attempt to convince you otherwise - a day of relaxation at the beach would work wonders for your mental health (you highly doubted this). But still, stress was yet to release you. What would your classmates think? Would they even understand why you felt compelled to save them from the grotesque image of your swimsuit-clad form?...Could they? Everyone in that class, hell - probably the entire school, had such appealing figures! None were particularly conscious about their body. They didn't need to be! They all just radiated beauty, inside and out.

You were simply an outcast. Unwanted and alone...a blemish upon the flawless effigy of society.

So you avoided them, for the most part. You admired from afar. Bakugou was generally the exception - you were shy, yes, but it was difficult to avoid the person you adored with such ferocity. Though...

...those models couldn't possibly wish to associate with, or have themselves thrown into the same category as you. And your one saving grace flickered like a dying candle, as your own heart caved. The boy's whose attention was dreadfully important to you, and whose opinion could leave you on the cusp of either ecstasy or death...his reputation would suffer greatly from your companionship. You harboured the largest crush on him, and yet...you couldn't let him know. He couldn't be seen with someone so...someone so...chunky? There wasn't a delicate word waiting to roll off your tongue. There wasn't a pill able to alleviate all the pain. There wasn't an angry boyfriend to beat up your bullies, or comfort you when you cried - when your heart begged for mercy.

The popular girls never failed to lend excruciating credence to your deepest insecurities. Bakugou didn't seem the affectionate type, and he would definitely side with them...wouldn't he?

Of course he would.

Who wouldn't? It's common sense!  Your inferiority complex screamed, into the sorrow-drenched corners of your mind. Popularity, to you, rivalled wisdom. It was be foolish to believe that someone as beloved and strong as he would fall victim to human sympathy - regardless of his status as a hero in training, he wasn't the kindest. He also claimed not to care for anyone beside himself. This tough façade was as transparent as glass if only you stared for too long, but that had no positive implications for you. There wasn't a scrap of interest or love amid those crimson eyes, though you had been thankful for the contact. Granted, he was yelling in utter fury at the time, but if you didn't change the focus to something...less depressing, you might not survive the night.

And an un-reciprocated romance shouldn't shove you on to the front-line of a losing battle.

So instead, you gazed up at your ceiling, hoping that soon, sleep would cleanse you of your thoughts. Tomorrow would usher in a few hours of isolation, where you could reflect and show yourself that you didn't need Bakugou. Your heart might apotheosize him, but maybe your mind could be convinced that he was just an accessory - something you thought you wanted, for the sake of having it. After all, the love of another couldn't actually replace the self-love you so desperately needed. You only thought it could.

Well, sleep captured you, but the universe threw a spanner in your plans.

Bakugou had abstained from going on the the field trip.

Why hadn't he gone on the field trip? And why was he standing outside your door, demanding entry? He sounded slightly calmer than usual, albeit his voice was still tinged with anger. You were hesitant to let him in. Was he here to mock you, out of sight and mind of your classmates? Would his inevitable words of hatred lure you toward the balcony? And would you jump, willingly...or would you fall, by some tragic accident? Heartbreak, and desires so selfish as happiness and love...would they prove to be your undoing? Was this...was this it?

No, you were being dramatic again.

Or were you?

"Oi, dumbass. Open the door already, I don't have all day." You flinched, as he continued, "I'm fed up of you ignoring me. I wanna know what I did."

That was the last thing you expected. "What you did? But...you didn't do anything?"

"I'm not convinced, idiot. Open the damn door, before I break it down."

I'm gonna die here, aren't I?

Your brows furrowed in both confusion and worry. "U-Um...just a - just a minute..."

"Hurry up."

The door creaked open slowly, attesting to your low confidence and the assumption that he would harm you, in some way. He sauntered inside, brushing against your arm. You flushed, praying he would leave promptly, so you could veil your disgraceful reaction behind the duvet. How dare you blush, how dare your heart pound so violently for him. He needed to go, but did you have the authority to kick him out? He was so powerful, so...wonderful. You couldn't compete, so shouldn't you bend to his will? Just submit already. Do as he wishes. Don't oppose him. Never oppose him.

"Hey, why the fuck are you so tense? This is your room, right?" He spoke, prompting you to look.

Why did I do that?? He's too pretty - I can't look at him! That's so disrespectful!! Oh, I bet he hates me now...he probably did anyway, but, I mean...

You averted your gaze, hoping not to instigate a fight. "Um...I-I'm sorry."

Irritation etched itself on to his face. "Oi, look at me when I'm talkin' to you."

Do I have to? Come on, just breathe, (Y/n)!

"But...b-but..." Your eyes started to water. "...I...I can't."

"Hah?! Why the fuck not?"

Please don't shout! Wait...no - I can't order him around!! What am I thinking?

You risked the briefest of glances, and immediately regretted it. He was almost trembling with the force of his agitation. Maybe he really was going to kill you. But...but...you hadn't learned self-love yet! You hadn't fully lived - years were wasted wallowing in anxiety and depression. You couldn't die now...

"Um...w-why didn't you go...on the - on the trip...?" You asked, resorting to staring at the ground.

Bakugou moved. You flinched, for the second time. "Didn't feel like it. Why should I waste my free time on a bunch of extras?" Then, after a moment of deliberation, he added, "Why didn't you go?"

"I...I wouldn't look...any good...i-in a swimsuit." Your voice trailed off, but he caught the words.

"Huh? That's a poor excuse. You care that much about what people think?"

You blinked. "Well...y-yeah. I'm hardly a...a model."

"You didn't come to UA to be a model. You came here to be a hero, and worrying about people's opinions is only gonna distract you." He retorted, a smirk playing at his lips.

Is this a trick? Bakugou isn't...he isn't so nice.

"But, I...I can't be a h-hero if I'm always doubting myself..."

Maybe I should quit. Is that what he's implying?

A piercing glare was aimed at you. "Then stop doubting. You don't owe anyone, and who cares anyway? Why the hell would you wanna look like a shitty extra?"

Bakugou sat cross-legged on your bed.

Your heart nearly exploded in your chest.

"Hang on, was that why you ignored me?! (L/N)-ARGHH!"

[Word Count: 1249]