Only A Kiss - boyxboy

Chapter 22 - The return

I came back from leave a couple days later. Simon still wasn't back from New York yet so I couldn't speak to him yet and I was in turmoil. I didn't know how to even start talking to him. I didn't know how to even begin telling him that I thought he may have been my first ever kiss. Maybe if we sorted things out, he would reveal it over time? Or I could mention it and see what happens. I had to get our friendship back first though.

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I was still stuck in New York, itching to get back to Boston and talk to Cas - or T it seemed. Did he know? Hopefully I had given him enough hints. He hadn't text me or anything since the funeral so I wasn't sure. And what if he did know but didn't care or want to speak to me about it? I don't know if I could handle that.

I had to come up with a plan of action. I was leaving tomorrow so I had to come up with something quick - I wanted this sorted as soon as possible, that was certain. I couldn't just half-arse it and hope for the best. I had to go all out for it to make sure I had done all I could to be with the man I loved.

I loved him. The minute I realised who he was, I was a 100% sure of it. I knew I was falling for him and thought I did love him already but this was just the final seal of the coffin. I was whole-heartedly in love with Castiel Roberts.

I was actually in a cab on my way to the airport when an idea struck me. It was perfect. And I knew that after this, he would be very clear on exactly who I was and what I wanted. The rest was up to him.

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I had heard Simon was back now but I hadn't seen him yet. It had been a whole day and he hadn't arrived at the office as far as I was aware. I was about to pack up my stuff ready to head home when I heard it.

When I look into your eyes
Its like watching the night sky
Or a beautiful sunrise... 

No. It couldn't be, could it? The voice was a bit more mature now.

Well I wont give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love...

I headed out of my office to see a rather messy-haired, dischevelled Simon perched on one of the desks strumming a guitar. He looked very sexy like this. Clearly nobody knew what the hell was going on, and Tim looked a bit freaked as it was his desk.

...I'll be here patiently waiting...

...Even the stars they burn...

...We got a lot to learn...

...No I won't give up...

...I don't want to be someone who walk away so easily
I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make...

He looked up now directly into my eyes.

I wont give up on us
Even if the skies get rough
I'm giving you all my love
I'm still looking up 

It was Star. That's all that made its way into my head before I walked over to him, pulled the guitar over his head and planted my lips firmly on his. I could hear some gasps, some cheers, and some awkward coughs in the background but I didn't care. We had finally found one another.

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It was a stupid idea. One that would probably backfire, but I had to try. I still played guitar sometimes  when I was alone, but never to anyone else. The holiday had created some memories for me that I couldn't push away and I just couldn't spread those memories with anyone else. My guitar and singing was for T only.

Maybe if I had shown this still to Cas sooner he may have clicked and we could have saved all this time and pain. I have no idea, it could have been a disaster - could have been too soon for him to realise. I had planned on playing something to him eventually, when he was actually mine (this was before I knew who he was).

So now I had an idea. Maybe if I played that song to him, he would finally see who I really was. I hadn't intended to do it in the office in front of everyone. I wanted to do it in the safety of one of our apartments but when I got back to Boston, I had been running around like a headless chicken all day organising everything I had missed at work. It was getting on for time and I realised it wasn't long before people would be heading home for the day. And I felt like I was going to chicken out if I left it any longer.

So I grabbed my guitar, ran out of my apartment not even dressed properly and hailed a cab straight to the office. His floor was my first stop. I got to his door and froze. I was getting some funny looks so I steadied myself on a nearby desk, poor Tim looked so confused. Then I went for it. I chose a song he would recognise, a song that would take us back to the very first moment I tried to find out if he liked me. Right back to the holiday.

He didn't come out for quite a few lines of the song and I panicked a little, thinking he may have gone home already or not turned up that day. How could I not have even checked? When he finally came out, I couldn't place the look on his face. Embarrassment, confusion, excitement, happiness. I couldn't tell as I tried not to look up too much in case I lost track of what I was doing. I hope I was doing the right thing.

I looked up at him for the last few lines, just like I had done 10 years ago. He had to know, he had to realise. I finished the song and he stared at me for just a few seconds before he marched his way over to where I was sitting. I thought he was going to punch me at first but he simply pulled the guitar over my shoulders and kissed me sweetly.

'My place or yours?' he whispered seductively in my ear. Neither of us spoke as we just walked straight out and took a cab back to mine, leaving everyone in the office stunned.