Jagi ♡ OT7/Reader FF ♡ Complete ♡

Chapter Fifty Four

"What do you mean?" Y/N cocks a brow inquisitively, eyes slightly narrowed as Hoseok pushes himself away from the wall and approaches the bed.

"What happened back in the lab?" The agent asks, tone clipped as he grabs the chair by the desk and drags it over to sit beside her.

"I don't know what you want me to say Hoseok, you were there so you pretty much already know everything, there isn't much more I can tell you." Y/N doesn't understand the reason for his sudden hostility, what could she have possibly done to cause this kind of reaction? The two of them seemed to be getting along back in the lab, what changed since then? Surely it wasn't the freaking out and collapsing, it wasn't like she did that on purpose.

"Why did hearing Guk in pain prompt such a strong reaction from you? It's not like the two of you are close, you barely know each other." Hoseok leans forward in the chair, elbows resting on his knees as he steeples his fingers beneath his chin.

"I wish I could tell you, believe me when I say you aren't the only one confused by what happened. It was instantaneous, like my body just reacted before I even had a chance to really acknowledge it myself. It was pure unadulterated fear and panic....this overwhelming need to be with him, to take the pain away. It got intense, like it was the only thing I could feel or focus on in that moment, so intense that it was like my body couldn't handle it which is probably why I passed out." Y/N knows it sounds crazy but there's no other way she can explain it. "I just feel like ever since I met you guys everything has become this jumbled up mess in my head, I can't figure out why I feel the way I do." She shakes her head, tone exasperated.

"What do you mean? What do you feel?" Hoseok furrows his brow, chin coming to rest in the palm of his hand.

"The moment I first met Tae I felt this overwhelming need to be with him, to stay close to him. I remember how devastated I felt the next morning when I woke up and he wasn't there, not even a note. It was just a one night stand, we talked and shared a few things  but it was just sex yet the next day I felt so hollow and the feeling stayed with me. I tried to forget him, tried to tell myself that maybe I just wasn't the kind of girl who enjoys one night stands but deep down I always knew there was something more to it. I kept thinking, holy shit this is totally creepy, why am I obsessively thinking about this guy? It's a stupid one night stand, get the hell over it but I couldn't, it was like a piece of me was missing. Then there's Jungkook, my pull to him feels just as strong as my pull to Tae. I didn't even know the guy, he shows up at workplace and it was like this weird instant connection, like I knew I could already trust him. I didn't want to think too much about it, I locked it away and told myself it was ridiculous to feel that way about someone so soon after meeting them because how is that even logical? I mean, who just agrees to spend the day with a guy they've just met? I tried to tell myself it was because I was lonely, that maybe I was still feeling bitter  over the way things transpired with Tae but deep down there was a part of me that knew it was something more....something I couldn't explain or was too afraid to. I couldn't tell my friends or family about it because the entire situation is insane, they would probably send me to a shrink and to be perfectly honest with you I wouldn't even blame them. I feel this need to be with Tae, to stay close and allow him to protect me but then with Jungkook it's the opposite, I feel like I need to stay close to him and make sure he's safe. Why? Why the hell do I feel like this? I'm going insane aren't I? I'm finally losing it, the stress of multiple jobs alongside my studies is probably driving me to the brink of insanity." Y/N slumps back against the pillows, exhausted.

It felt good to finally let it all out, to finally acknowledge all these crazy thoughts and feelings she's been having since meeting Tae and Jungkook.