One of the Boys

Nostalgia

I was laying in my bed at midnight with my headphones on with my bed covers over my head. Even though I was supposed to be sleeping since it was a Tuesday night, all I could do was let my mind wander.

I turned on my phone and changed the song. Since it was on Shuffle, I took my chances.

The screen read:
Eminem- Mockingbird

Not only was this a very sad song, but it was by Eminem, who was my idol. I know he's a guy, but I don't care. His story made me discover that anything is possible. In a very strange way, we can relate to each other. I mean, think about it, neither of us truly had a real family to help us a young kids. We both had to experience physical abuse, and we both know the feeling of true perseverance.

I wish Aunt Tanya and Uncle Scott didn't have to come over. They are going to cause some kind of trouble, I can feel it. It's even more overwhelming now that my parents know about what they did to me. This just makes everything more complicated. What if Mom and Dad try to talk to them about it? My aunt and uncle would be steaming angry. They might even try to do something worse than hitting or slapping me. I could feel my heart pounding against my chest. I could feel a huge lump in my throat and the corners of my eyes began to burn. The hot tears streamed down my face, and at that moment, all I wanted was for someone to hug me and tell me "it's okay."

The tears kept rolling down my face and I could barely breathe. It was almost as if I was drowning in my worries and sadness.

'Why are you so sad? You have a good life now. You should be happy that you're not living with Aunt Tanya and Uncle Scott anymore.' This was all I could tell myself as I cried and cried. No matter how much I shamed myself, I was going to have to let it out some day.

I woke up feeling drowsy and lazy.

"Mom, do I have to go to school? I feel really tired and I have a headache." I told my Mom as I got out of bed in my green pyjama pants and old t-shirt.

"Nice try, kiddo. You still have to go to school." My mom said. She looked awake and alert with her black pantsuit on and a pair of pumps that clicked as she walked on the hardwood floor. She smiled at me and then walked into her room to continue getting ready.

I laughed at the fact that my Mom said "kiddo". Then, I got changed into a pair of skinny jeans and a cardigan. Today I felt a bit girly, so why not?
After eating my breakfast, I quickly put my curly hair into a ponytail.

When I got to school, I made it all the way through the morning without anything major happening.

As I was walking to where my locker was, I felt a light tap on my shoulder. I turned around to see the person I least expected to be standing there.

It was Elena. I almost did a double take.

"Hi Sasha." She almost whispered. There was something going on because I could see it in her eyes. She kept glancing at the floor and playing with her hands. Also, her mascara was a little smudged and it made her look really tired.

"Hey. Is something wrong?" I asked. I cringed after I said that because her eyes automatically started to water.
"It's okay. Tell me what happened in the bathroom." I told her.
I gently grabbed to signal to her that I was going to lead her there.

"But, don't you want to put your books away first?" She asked.

"Nah. This is probably way more important than stupid binders and textbooks." I dismissed.

With that, she nodded and walked beside me all the way to lonely girl's washroom.

"Okay, spill." I said.

"Well... Uh... Um, My mom thinks we should move to a different city because my Dad isn't being supportive." She said quickly. I saw a small tear roll down her cheek. Her mascara got a bit more smudged as she wiped at her face.

"Oh my gosh, Elena, that's really bad." I had no idea what else to say because this is my first time talking to her. It was terrible that she had to move. I just didn't know how to comfort her at a time like this.

"Jackson hasn't been helping me much either. He doesn't even seem to care at all." She began to rant on. Then, some kind of weird look flashed over her eyes and she said,
"Are you the reason that Jackson doesn't care about me anymore? Did you cause me to lose my boyfriend?"

And at that exact second, I wished that I just would've stayed home.