Pain and Distractions

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Donny's POV:

I am starting to think that everyone was meant to leave. Everyone was meant to go away. All this time, Dale was the only constant thing I have in my life. Even before we saw each other again, the idea of her never left me. But now, I guess she's just done. Paulit ulit akong nagmakaawa for another chance but she dismisses it each and every time.

Jess: "Donny, what the hell man, you had a guesting today! Kung hindi pa lumapag ng mas maaga yung eroplano ko hindi ko pa malalaman na hindi ka sumipot, pinaguusapan ka na online Donny, they have been seeing you drunk almost every night in different clubs, you show up late in your commitments! Kung hindi late lasing! Are you purposely trying to sabotage your career?"

Donny: "What's there to lose Jess? Nothing anyway, let's just drink-"

Jess: "Alam mo hindi kita maintindihan, akala ko ba mahal mo tong trabaho mo? Then what are you doing? Is it because of Dale?"

Donny: "This job ruined my relationship-"

Jess: "Bull sh** Donny hindi, you fucked up, it's not your career who ruined you and Dale, ikaw mismo. Bakit if not for this career, would you even have the balls to find her? Oh diba siya pa nga yung kung ano anong ginawa para lang makausap at makita kang uli! But what did you do? Wala parin, you decided to pretend as if you don't remember her, pati kami pinaniwala mo noon diba? Para saan? Okay you know what, let's say na sa industriyang ito, mahirap magpaka totoo, but remember Donny, you always have a choice. And for the many times you were given those, you always chose to pretend, you always chose to hide- Baka nga may kasalanan ako, o itong career kung bakit ka iniwan, but you had the chance to make everything right from the beginning, why didn't you? Tapos ngayon? Convenient ulit maging duwag, kasi meron ka nanamang pwedeng sisihin, you know what, I don't even care, you do what you want to do. I'll watch you kill the fire that you worked so hard to make. I just hope you know your endgame here Donny."

She stormed out of my apartment.

Donny: "Sure, leave too. I don't care anymore. Why am I even bothered? I'm used to this, I'm used to being alone. I'm used to not being chosen.- These fans only loves me when I'm at my best, but the moment they see me at my worst, naguunahan pa silang husgahan ako- so who gives a flying fuck if all these disappear"

When I checked my bar I already emptied all my liquor bottles. I decided to go to my favorite club.

Donny: "Gin and tonic please- double"

I started to feel like I was spinning around, the loud music just kept pounding in my head. I downed my drink and ordered another two. I felt hands around my waist. Someone's hugging me from behind.

Shantelle: "Hi, I haven't seen you here in a long time."

Donny: "Uh, you know I was in a relationship before you decided to destroy it."

Shantelle: "That was inevitable Donny, the relationship started with a lie, it was meant to end anyway. Besides aren't you enjoying the free life again, you can do whatever you want now."

Donny: "What is there to enjoy now? I have nothing-"

Shantelle: "Well that's not entirely true, I'm here- and I'll show you that I am more worthy of you-"

I felt her hands around my neck, and before I know it she was already kissing me. I don't know why I responded to the kiss, maybe because for a little while now, that was the only time I felt needed again. I felt wanted.

I woke up with a pounding headache. Then I saw Shantelle sleeping beside me, sh**, what the fu**.

What the hell Donny, what are you doing! I got up and started wearing my pants, then my shirt.

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