Yara & Yuhan ✔ (editing)

Chapter 20

To my dearest son Yuhan,

Assalamu alaikum warahmathullahi wabarakathuhu...

How are you my prince? I hope you are fine because I always prayed for it. I know Allah would answer my prayers.

By the time you get this letter, Abdur Rahman would have told you about me. But I'm not sure whether he told you everything.

First of all I want to tell you, I didn't leave you because I don't love you but because I had to.

When you were just three years old, I came to know that I was suffering from cancer. I didn't want to tell that to Abdur Rahman because I know he will be highly worried. He will not hesitate to do anything. He would have left everything behind and will always be with me. I'm not that bad to make him put all his dreams aside and look after me.

I revealed everything to Usama; your uncle; the one who gave you this letter, who came back after undergoing a plastic surgery in America after a terrible accident.

He too understood my situation and he told that he'll help me. Doctors said that I'm not in danger because I was still at the first stage. We tried to do treatments without letting Abdur Rahman know about it.

Unfortunately, he spotted me talking with Usama. He misunderstood it to be someone else. I didn't tell him the truth as I wanted to wait for the right time.

But, my condition started to become worse. I was asked to get regular treatments. I then decided that Abdur Rahman should go ahead in life with a better partner.

I'm not the right one to give him hope.

The only person to cross my mind at that time was, Nuzrath. I told her everything and asked her to marry Abdur Rahman but she refused. I did understand her because Abdur Rahman was always a brother figure to her.

I know it was a selfish request but I was helpless. I wanted the best for Abdur Rahman. No one can take better care of him other than Nuzrath. I somehow tried to convince her. I did succeed.

I then asked Abdur Rahman to marry Nuzrath. He too refused as I expected. I already knew that he was doubting me because, he saw me with Usama several times. So, I decided to make him hate me.

I shared my idea with Usama but he did not agree. I asked him to do it for his brother-in-law. He somehow agreed unwillingly.

Only I know how much pain I went through to make my own husband, whom I loved so much, hate me. I was worried about you too my little prince. But I knew Nuzrath would take Good care of you.

After few days I came to know another thing about me. I was pregnant. That's the least thing I expected. I was scared. Scared that my disease will effect my unborn child. I regretted for taking so much time to make him hate me. It was difficult because he trusted me and loved me too much.

I decided to tell him about everything but he got to know about my pregnancy before that. He thought that the child wasn't his.

It pained to know that he doubted me in such a way. I very well know that he behaved in such a way because of my own actions. It must have pained him too to accuse me.