The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings Imagines

White Clover pt. 7 -Thranduil

(Warning: angstyyyyyy)

Legolas sighed, his cheek resting against his palm as he watched his father look through a stack of papers on his desk. He knew Thranduil was thinking about a lot of things, but he was quite sure it wasn't about trade or any business related to Mirkwood.

The day you and Thranduil decided to watch him practice, he noted the sad smile on your face. A few moments later, one of the guards approached Thranduil and said that there was something the King must attend to immediately. When Thranduil offered to walk you back to your room before doing his duties, you had declined and said that you'll stay and watch Legolas.

But the moment Thranduil was gone, you stood up and walked away on your own.

Legolas absolutely had no idea what you might have said or asked and what his father might have answered. But since then you've been more distant. It wasn't only Legolas who noticed. Thranduil was clearly upset at the sudden change. But of course, because of his pride, he won't ask you anything about it and would rather distract himself with work. Why should he be bothered? Why should he try to ask you? You're only a guest here, a person they're trying to help, a person who invaded their dreams for years and someone they already consider special—why should Thranduil be bothered?

Why is he so bothered?

Thranduil dropped his pen and leaned back on his seat, groaning in frustration.

"Ada, I think you should go to (Y/N) and ask her why she has been avoiding you," Legolas said.

The King glared at him. "'And why should I? If she wants to avoid me, let her do so!"

Legolas wanted so badly to kick his father at that moment but he stopped himself. "I know that is not how you truly feel," he said. "Ada, I can see it clearly in your eyes, no matter how hard you try. I see longing. There must be a reason why she appeared in your dreams and why you found her first when she came to our world."

"What do you think I should do?" Thranduil barked. "Give in and let my heart make all the decisions? Forget your mother and what I feel for her? I should not be feeling this way, Legolas. You know I still love your mother very much. I do not think it is right to find someone else just because she isn't here."

"Ada, loving someone else doesn't mean you have to forget the love you had and still have for Nana. I believe the Valar are giving you another chance at love." Legolas looked out of the window, taking note of the dark clouds in the sky. It might rain this evening. "You have been through so much pain. You deserve to be happy. Loving (Y/N) does not mean you no longer love Nana. I also think Nana would want you to take this chance."

Thranduil looked at his hands and remembered the way he held yours when he gave you the bracelet. Indeed he missed talking to you and going on walks with you. It was like all his worries melt away whenever he is around your presence. The urge to gather you in his arms was getting stronger. The thought of calling you his would often cross his mind.

He was just worried that loving you will mean that he was trying to forget and erase his wife from his life. And that thought unsettled him.

But maybe Legolas is right. Maybe it wasn't a sin to love you. Maybe he was being given a chance. Maybe this is a gift and not a curse.

A knock came on the door and Legolas allowed them to come in. An elleth whom they knew as someone who tended to your needs came in with a troubled expression on her face. They raised their eyebrows and asked what was wrong.

"My lord, Lady (Y/N) is nowhere to be found."

Thranduil stood up. "What do you mean?"

"When I came to fetch her for dinner, she was not in her room. I went around to see if she was in the gardens or roaming around the caves. I also asked around if they have seen her but no one has spotted her since this morning."

As soon as she finished her sentence, Tauriel came running into the room. She bowed her head in respect before saying, "Someone told me they saw Lady (Y/N) slip out of the caves and run into the forest."

Thranduil wasted no time and began running down the halls, removing and throwing his great robe onto the floor. There was no time to get on a horse. He felt he'd be wasting time if he went to the stables first. When thunder rumbled in the distance, Thranduil hurried and disappeared behind the trees.

Thunder rumbled and lightning flashed, and in a few minutes it started to rain.

Unbeknownst to them, you were by Thranduil's favorite tree. You had been digging by the roots in hopes you'd see your box. Maybe it would help you get home faster. No matter how much you circled around the tree, you could no longer see the image of home like you did when Thranduil took you to this place for the first time.

You weren't really that desperate to go home yet. You knew the countdown on your arm signaled your time left in this world. But you've been plagued by dreams, dreams of you as a child happily burying your box, dreams of Thranduil burying a box.

And in some way, you felt as if your questions about why you were brought here were in your box. So you were hoping that it'd be here. You wanted to know why you were sent here, why Thranduil saw you in his dreams, why you were here just to feel brokenhearted.

But you've been digging and digging and even though you've been clawing through mud and you were already shaking from the cold, there was no box.

The questions have been keeping you awake late at night. These dreams have been distracting you all day.

Why won't they give you answers?

You were about to break down and cry when you heard someone calling out your name. Someone emerged from behind the trees and Thranduil appeared. His calls ceased when he saw you kneeling on the ground, your dress and hands caked with mud.

He went towards you, frantically checking if you were hurt. When he was sure that you were okay, his worried face contorted into anger. Thranduil grabbed your arms and shook your figure, eyes seething.

"What were you thinking?" he roared. "You know how dangerous the forest is! It is teeming with orcs and evil magic. Have you forgotten that this is no longer your world? You barely know how to defend yourself and I doubt you can outrun anything that can come and hunt you down. Are people from your world this stupid?"

Yes, you were ashamed, but you won't just sit back and let him insult you and the people from your world. You glared at him but before you could say anything, Thranduil continued to shout at you.

"Haven't they told you that you cannot leave without my permission?" Thranduil laughed humorlessly. "I must also be stupid to let myself be worried and be bothered by you. To think I let myself think that I feel something for you! I wish I had never seen you in my dreams. Maybe I'd be free from all this pointless worrying and—"

Thranduil was unable to finish his sentence when he felt a slap on his cheek. His words were like taking a sword through the heart. You could no longer listen to him.

Without another word, you walked away from him and made your way back to the path.

"Please, just let me go home," you whispered to yourself, caressing the tattoo on your arm.

'Twelve'

That night you realized that it would have been better if it was only you had feelings.

Because it was less painful to receive a rejection than be told that the person you love regretted loving you back.