Loving you

Skye

I wake up with a jump, my door has just closed. I look over and Gianni is still asleep to my right and Gigi sleeping to my left in her basket. I get out of bed putting on the Giannis jumper from before and heading downstairs. I hear my mom talking to someone, I thought Kate but when I reach the bottom of the stairs I see Marianna. "Jasmine what are you doing up? I just checked on you and you were asleep." Smiles my mum moving her phone for me to sit next to her.
"I think I heard you close my door... They're still asleep." I explain taking the seat next to my mom.

I listen to my mom and Marianna talk about Enzo for maybe 30 minutes. The whole time I thinking about how I don't know how I'm going to get passed this. Enzo was my best friend, my daughters father, he was family. My mom and Marianna go quiet and I put my hand on my moms knee. "Mom... I want to live with dad." As the words leave my mouth I feel my moms mood change. My parents haven't been together for years and I haven't seen my dad since before Giulietta was born.

"Don't you think it's too soon to make a decision like that?" Asks my mom looking between me and Marianna.

"I just know that if I stay here mom, it won't do any good for me and in turn Gigi... please mom." I plead feeling tears begin to stream down my face.

"Yes I'll call your dad in the morning. I think you should go back to bed. Marianna is going to stay tonight." Explains my mom standing up.

"I can go myself it's okay. Night." I say kissing my mom and Marianna on the cheek and heading back up the stairs to my room.

When I walk in, the room is different but a way I can't explain. As walk over to Gigi's basket I see she's not there and panic but when I look at Gianni he has her in the middle of the bed and he's at the edge. They're both still asleep. I take Gigi from under Gianni's arm and place her back in her crib and get back into bed. It's warm and feels nice but I can't stop thinking about Enzo, he must have been so scared.

I wake up a few more times during the night but decide to stay awake around 6 when Gigi wakes up. She cry's a little and I feel Gianni stir next to me. When I begin to feed her she calms down and I feel like at least I'm doing something right. "Hey your awake."groans Gianni. He doesn't move but I can see his messy hair.

"Yeah I haven't slept much. I spoke to my mom last night, I'm going to live with my dad. I just think it will be better for me there." I begin to explain to him.

"You've never mentioned your dad... to any of us. Can't we convince you to stay." Asks Gianni sitting up and running his hands through his hair.

"Honestly I don't think so. I just want to start somewhere else. Somewhere that everything won't remind me of Enzo." I babble getting upset.

"Where does he live? Where would you be moving to?" Questions Gianni

"Skye, It's in Scotland." I look at his face slowly drop. "I know it's really far away but I have to do what's best for me and Gigi" I explain looking down at her.

"I get that. I do." He smiles "I'm just going to the bathroom." He walks out my room and my mom walks in.

"Your dads booked flights for next Wednesday. Pack essentials I can ship the rest." She smiles sitting down beside me. I can see she doesn't want me to go.

"Thanks mom. I'm sorry I'm going... I'll visit." I try and smile but it's hard. I don't like seeing my mom upset.

For the rest of the day I laze about the house Gianni left after lunch and Gigi spent time with my mom and Marianna while I stayed upstairs.

I haven't been going to school for the last couple of days leading up to my move. Getting things packed and ready. We had a small ceremony for Enzo and it was so hard. I don't want to remember him the way I seen him in hospital. I want to remember him laughing and smiling, hugging me and Giulietta.

When I told Annie, Ella and Luca that I was leaving, they didn't take it as well as Gianni. There was some tears and hugs. I explained to them that it's just better for me to try and start a fresh.

The night before the flight.
I was saying goodbye to some friends and a teacher from school. The last couple of days I've been seeing and saying goodbye to a lot of people
. On my walk home I take in things I've never noticed before. How large the park is, how amazing the tree lined streets look, especially when the sun streams through them like it's doing right now. I turn the corner and see my house one of the first on this new street. My mom had planted some Marigolds and pansies in the front yard making it pop. I'll miss it here. I open the door and put the pram at the side of the living room and look up to see my mom, sister, Ella, Annie, Luca, Gianni and Marianna all sitting together. "A goodbye party. It's the least we can do." Smiles my mom walking over to me and kissing my cheek.

We spent the afternoon talking and eating the snacks my mom and Marianna had set out. It was really nice to have my closest friends and family around. My mom was showing Marianna the seeds she uses for the flowers in the front, Ella and Luca were fascinated in Giulietta and Kate and Annie were trying to find old pictures of me in an album on the floor. Gianni gets up and heads upstairs, the bathroom I guess. "I'm just getting a sweatshirt. Keep an eye on Gigi." I smile at Ella and Luca walking up the stairs and towards my bedroom. Just as I've pulled on a light grey sweatshirt with 'Colorado' written across the front of it on Gianni comes in. "Hey" he says coming in and closing the door.

I sit down on the edge of my bed. "Hi"
He walks over to the window and closes it shutting it tightly at the lock. "If your cold you should close the window." He smirks. Trying to be as normal as can be between us even though I know he's hurt I'm leaving.
"Gi... Gi I'm so-" he cuts me off.
"Don't apologise for doing what's right. We'll all be here. We all care about you."he smiles. Coming towards me. This moment of him coming towards me lasts a while until he's right next to me. He takes a seat beside me and I instantly feel heat radiating from him.

"I don't really want to leave but I have to it's better for me and Gigi." I explain one last time even though I know I don't need too. "Gi... I'm"

Just as I go to apologise again he leans in towards me and before I know it we're kissing. His warm lips against mine and this time it was definitely more than a peck on the cheek. I keep kissing him, it feels familiar. Then he pulls back. "I had to... before you left." He smiles. "I have to pick my mom up from the airport so this is goodbye." Even though he's smiling I know he's hurting.

"Thank you, Gi. You've done so much for me." As he goes to walk away I pull back on his arm and kiss him again. My hand cupping his burning cheek. It lasts a couple of seconds and this time I pull away. "Bye" he says. He leaves my room and I watch him head towards the stairs. I wait a couple of minutes before going downstairs. Composing myself but also gathering a couple of more things and putting it back in the box. Today was my last full day here and tomorrow my new life adventure would start in Skye....