First book in 'My Name' series..
She didn't inherit the 'smart genes' in the family, that was the first reason she was pushed aside. Still Reo struggled to get enough grades, but she can't be smart even after trying. Besides, it'll be wasted efforts...
The first picture was of Leo and I, our fuzzy brown curls were at an infant stage, just like we were. Leo is older by a few months, six or eight, no one really laid attention to that, they treated us like twins most of the time. Leo was holding me in his chubby hands with a wide smile, his hair dropping on his forehead, wore a tarzan sleeveless top with light up sneakers. I wasn't sure what age we were, I looked pretty young there, maybe I was three or four, or may the first few months of the year before we moved here, in The States.
After we moved, from Canada to The States, Leo was distant. He didn't want to be distant, but after a woman with her black hair pulled back a navyblue pantsuit with a Prada handbag came through the doors of our empty living room, her heels clicking on the floor until Leo came out with his toy racetruck, he became distant. At first, he played with me, we both sat on my plastic chairs and drank invisible tea until my mom would come telling Leo it was time for his schedule, then Leo didn't play anymore. Whenever I was awake, he was having a bunch of lessons; a piano perched at the far end of the hallway, a violin case on the floor beside the kitchen wall, a string of guitar sitting on the wooden stairs, and when I was asleep, he locked his doors.
I asked my mom one day why Leo wouldn't play with me anymore, she laughed and told me he was busy. As a child, I almost cried because I thought Leo didn't want me as his sister anymore. I became a real-life frozen character; knocking at his door, asking him to come out, and eventually learning how to write at five.
Slip a piece of paper under the gap between his door and the tiled floor, wait for a few minutes and he would slip the same paoer with a reply at the back for me to read.
Hi Leo, should I eat pancakes or eggs today? Have you also eaten something? Love Reo.
He would sometimes take as long as a whole day before replying and sometimes I would hear the soft click of him opening his pen and writing his reply.
Eat pancakes, they are the best. I ate pancakes too. Have fun today. Love you too, Leo.
After a few weeks of the letter exchanges, he just stopped as well.
Now, looking at the pieces of paper and slightly noticeable salivary-eraser marks, I wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. There was a tighting in my chest, something telling me to run away and look for Leo, for us to stay wherever he was together but I couldn't. I won't survive a day out in the streets, for all that might happen, Leo might have ran far away. No one cared.
In a few hours to come, I would have to wake up, practice, and impersonate Leo. I would have to do anything my parents asked, even if it meant drowing in the image of Leo, I couldn't do it, I might just breakdown in tears at the interview.
Never let them do this to you. I love you so much, Reo. With that same love, Leo.
He warned me, even at fiveyearsold, he warned me. At five I was a weak scared puppet. It didn't still change at eighteen, I'm still the same weak and scared girl I'll always be. I've always been Reo.
I pushed the box back into its place and crawled out of the closet, my heart dragging me down from getting up to walk. Until I got to the side of my bed did I get up, pushed myself to the bed snd covered myself with my blanket around my shoulder.
Before I fell into a dreamless sleep, I thought of Leo, and for the first time in a long time, I prayed. "Please keep him safe." And dreaded my own safety. .
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