Back to you | ✔

37 | Chapter Thirty Seven

B O N N I E

I stare down at my phone in complete shock. Who was this? And what did Josh do when I wasn't around? I don't understand. Not many people know about us, so that doesn't really help me narrow it down.

Obviously, Liv and Scott wouldn't be doing this, so maybe Josh has told someone else about us?

"Who is this?" I ask, desperately hoping they'll be like, oh sorry, forgot to tell you it's Cindy, but I know that isn't going to happen. Whenever someone messages you from a private number but they know you, it's intentional.

"Don't worry about that. Just know he isn't the guy you want him to be."

This is pissing me off now. Who thinks to message someone like that without any proof or anything to back it up? I don't bother replying to them; I'll just go straight to the source.

Just as I'm about to his call on Josh's name, a message pops up on my screen.

"1 New Attachment."

It's a video... I don't even want to open it up and see what's inside. I close my eyes and take in a deep breath before hitting play.

I watch as someone walks through a party, and I recognize straight away it's at the frat house. "What the hell?" I whisper to myself as I stare at my screen. The blood draining from my body with each second that passes by.

I sit on my bed still as I watch them pan the camera around the room, landing on Josh. He is sitting down in the lounge room with a beer in hand, sipping on it as he chats away with Scott. They're both smiling and seem to be having a good time.

I don't understand what the problem is in this video?

I watch for a few minutes, wondering what the hell I'm watching until I see it. A scantily clad girl enters the frame, strutting over to Josh and Scott. They both smile at her, and she joins in on their conversation. She's leaning against Scott as they talk, innocent really, but then she leans down and lowers herself into Josh's lap.

My heart falls to the pit of my stomach. He isn't pushing her away. She's sitting in his lap, in front of my best friend and he isn't telling her no. The video ends, and I throw my phone across the other side of my bed.

Was he playing me this entire time? I know he was a playboy before us, but I never thought he would play me like this. My heart is being torn in two different directions. One is telling me to trust Josh, and that there has to be more to this than what I saw. But the other side is telling me to run and run fast before I get my heart broken anymore.

Can I really trust him? My mind rushes back to the first night I kissed him when Olivia dared me to. He looked at me like I was a stranger, and he spoke to me like one too. I let down my guard and believed him when he told me he loved me, but maybe I was blinded by the way I felt for him.

Also, who the hell is this? And how did they get my number? It could be one of Josh's frat brothers or even one of his crazy ex-girlfriends, I know he has plenty of those floating around.

I stare at my phone with Josh's contact pulled up. I want to call him, but I also want to cuss out Scott for not telling me what happened. This was days ago now, he had plenty of opportunities to tell me, but he chose not to.

Going back and forth, I hit dial on Josh's name first. The line rings and rings and goes to voicemail.

"Josh, call me right the fuck now!"

I regret the message as soon as I hang up, who in their right mind would return a message like that. I know I wouldn't.

Scrolling through my contacts, I find Scott's name and go to hit call, but stop myself. What if he and Olivia knew about this and kept it a secret purposely? They're meant to be my best friends, what if everyone is against me in this?

Fuck it, I grumble to myself and hit call. He answers on the second ring, "Hey Bon, what's up?" he chirps, but there's nothing cheerful about this conversation.

"Don't what's up me, you traitor," I snap and grit my teeth.

"What?" he questions, acting all surprised.

"Who was she?" I demand stomping my foot as if he could see me. "Who was who? Is Liv up to her snooping games again?" he chuckles, and I want to punch his stupid face.

"The girl on Josh's lap, who is she?" The line falls silent, and I scoff at him, "are you seriously going to protect him now? What is this bro code or something?"

"Since when were you two so buddy-buddy?" I mock. "I have no idea what you're talking about Bon, are you sure you're okay?"

"No, I'm not okay, I thought you were my best friend. Why wouldn't you stick up for me and tell that girl to fuck off?"

"Bon seriously, what are you talking about?" His constant shock is starting to get on my nerves. "The party, after Liv and I left, you were talking to Josh, and some girl was sitting on his lap."

"Oh, you mean Serena?"

"Oh, SeReNa, yes, Serena, who is she?"

"She's no one," his nonchalant tone is pushing me towards the edge. "Don't lie to me; she didn't look like no one."

"Look? How did you even know about that?"

"Does it matter how I know?"

"Yes, it does matter because if you actually saw what happened, you would've seen Josh push her off of his lap and walk away." I go to speak, but he cuts me off. "Now, if you're done jumping down my throat, I want to get some sleep."

He hangs up before I can object, and I feel so guilty for jumping to conclusions. When did I become this crazy insecure girlfriend?

Was he right? Did Josh push her off his lap? I pull up the video again to watch it. I watch it another three times, and each time it ends just as she sits in his lap. That isn't enough time for me to see him push her away or not.

I go to hit play for the fourth time, but my phone lights up with an incoming call from Josh. Groaning to myself, I reluctantly answer.

"Hello?" I say coyly, and his panicked breathing comes through the line. "Bonnie, what the hell is going on?"

"I'm sorry; ignore me. I'm just being crazy," I chuckle, but even my laughter sounds fake. "Bonnie, seriously? Do you need me to come over?"

"No," I snap too fast, I need to come up with an excuse for my outburst. "I just have my period; it's not a big deal." He laughs, and his mood lightens, "BonBon, I don't care if you have your period, I can come over with snacks if you want?"

"No, it's okay, I think I just need to go to bed," Why is he always so nice to me? I just yelled at him on his voice mail, and he's offering to bring me snacks? Because of my 'period' Ugh.

"Okay, if you're sure, I'll let you get some sleep."

"Oh, and thank you for the letters, I loved them."

"I love you," he barely whispers, and I stiffen, my anger boiling to the surface yet again. "You love me?" I question sarcastically, "it didn't look like you loved me last Saturday night."

"What? Are you serious?"

"Yes, I'm serious, it looked to me like you were loving some SeReNA."

"Serena..." he says her name, trailing off, "Oh BonBon, no," I hang up before he can say another word. I don't want to deal with him right now; I still don't know if I can trust him or not.

Maybe things between Josh and me will always be too complicated to ever work.