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07 | Chapter Seven

B O N N I E

Mom loved Sky, and so did I. I thought he felt the same way about me too, but it's clear to me now that he never did. For him to move on so fast, like the next day, proves that to me, without a doubt. Maybe this breakup is the only way I will rediscover who I truly am without relying on Skylar for an identity.

Before him, I was everything rainbows and sunshine, which now makes me want to be sick. That style never suited me, but it felt like who I was at the time. Everything changed, though, the longer I hung around Sky and his friends.

They were known as the weird music kids at our school. The band geeks, but they were anything but geeky. As time went on, everyone else around school saw them in a different light. Skylar grew into himself and became known as that hot band guy around school, his friends too. They were infamous. Girls wanted to date them and boys secretly wanted to be them.

He gave off this bad boy persona, and that's how everyone else saw him, but he was anything but. He treated me so well. Well enough, that girls were jealous of our relationship. I found it hard to make any new girlfriends for a while. They hated me simply because I was dating him. Even the jocks and cheerleaders befriended him, but never me.

 When I saw him for the first time, I never imagined him to be a singer, or in a band, but hey, I shouldn't have judged his book by its cover. I remember the first time I saw him perform on stage with his band; I was like a moth to a flame. The confidence that radiated off of him drew me in and it was like a light went off in my head. News flash, you like Sky.

After that night, things were different. We were two very different people, from opposite worlds. I slowly changed things about myself to suit him. Our two friend groups could never coexist, no matter how hard we both tried. That's when I drifted from Liv and Scott to make Skylar happy. And that is the moment I lost my identity.

I think I used Skylar as a distraction from Josh leaving, but over time, my feelings for him grew. Having him around made the pain of losing Josh almost disappear. But there was always a hole in my heart where Josh used to be.

"Oh sweetheart, I'm so sorry," she says in barely a whisper, the sadness clear in her eyes. She can't hide her disappointment from me, but I expected that this would happen. We welcomed Skylar into our home, treated him as if he were a part of our family. The entire time we were together, he was a massive part of our lives. Even before then, when we were just friends, he was always around. It would be Skylar, Olivia, Scott, and me. But now, we've lost that part of our group. Although, I don't think Liv or Scott really care that he is gone. He was never close enough with either of them for it to matter.

 I lost my boyfriend, but my mom lost a friend.

I never thought too much of the friendship between mom and Sky. Truthfully, it thrilled me they got along so well, but never did I stop and think how this break up would feel for her. I'm the worst daughter in the entire world for never considering her. We both lost the only stable guy in our lives. All things aside, Skylar was kind to my mom, and I'll forever appreciate him for that.

The only person who never liked Skylar was Olivia. She hated him with every fiber of her being. They were fine before we started dating. But then something changed between them. It went from them tolerating one another to despising each other overnight. Neither of them would tell me what happened.

I suspected maybe she liked him before we started dating, so I confronted her about it, but she denied it vehemently. Mom thought maybe Liv was just jealous that I was spending more and more time alone with Sky, but who knows? I guess it doesn't matter now; she doesn't need to worry about his presence anymore, or ever again.