We Can See STARS

Chapter 14: Goodbye Benn

"Heeeeeey! What's up???"

"Ummmm...I could ask you the same question. What was that??"

"Oh you saw the game?"

"Not really. I went out for drinks and forgot to catch the game."

"Oh. Okay. That's cool."

"Yeah, D told me about it later. When's your hearing?"

"I don't know. Sometime this afternoon. It doesn't matter."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Nah, Segs and Roope are taking me out afterwards."

"Tyler and Roope are taking you out?"

"Yeah! I probably need to loosen up a little and they know how to have a good time."

"Oh. Okay." You stopped for a moment, thinking. Bringing up big subjects was never really your thing, especially in romantic relationships. So you tried to poke and prod at Jamie to see if he would come out with it. "Jamie."

"What's up girl?"

"Is there something on your mind?"

"No way. I'm doing great. Especially since I'm gonna go party with my dudes."

"Why are you talking like a 20 year old frat boy?"

"Relax."

"Okay, I'm gonna go. I hope your hearing goes okay. Let me know what happens."

"For sure. See ya!" He hung up immediately. The closeness you usually felt with him was absent. It was one of the weirdest conversations you'd had with him and the fact he was going out with Seguin and Roope did nothing to calm your mind. You just tried to get through your day and not think about it so much. Occasionally, you would look up any news about the hearing, feeling bad that you likely wouldn't hear it right from him. Usually, he would call you first with information like that but you weren't confident you'd get anything from him.

There were plans for everyone to meet up at Chicago's field today but you felt like you couldn't swing it today. Instead, you decided to stay at home to get the news and talk to Jamie if he needed to. Eventually, you were tired of nervously waiting, so you called him. No answer. You tried 3 more times. Nothing. He must have been out already. You called D.

"Hey, have you heard anything about the hearing yet?"

"Wait, you haven't?"

"No. I haven't heard from Benn and when I tried calling him, he didn't pick up. What was the result?"

"Suspended. For 10 games."

You couldn't remember the last time you were this mad at a person. Especially one you were so close with. You weren't sure what you were more mad about: that he was being weird with you, that he was acting like this or that he couldn't be bothered to call you. You tried again to call him and this time he picked up.

"Anaaaaa! What's up girl?"

"Jamie. What's going on?

"Shhhhh guys. The warden's on the phone." In the background you could hear girl's laughing. Your anger level only rose.

"I can't talk to you like this. Good night." You turned your phone off and slammed it down on the table. You just didn't know what to do.

The next day, after a terrible night's sleep, you decided that you would call him today. Try to get to the bottom of it and why he was acting so weird. Your stomach was in knots and your throat was dry. You tried to remember all of the things you loved about him, about your time in Bali, about the day you met him, anything to help you remember that this was worth it. Finally, you picked up the phone and called him on FaceTime. When he answered, it was clear he was still in bed and barely awake.