Marami ng beses kong itinanong sa sarili ko, bakit ako laging iniiwan ng taong iyon? Bakit mas pinipili niyang magpaalam kaysa sa manatili? Paano niya kinakayang lumayo kaysa sa lumapit? Higit sa lahat, mahal niya ba talaga ako?
Matagal ko nang pinaniwala sa sarili ko na hindi ko na siya mahal, I don't deserve someone who would love me from a distance, and not by my side. Parang niloloko lang niya ako. Puro lang siya sa salita, hindi naman niyang ginagawang patunayan na mahal niya ba talaga ako.
Oo, he has had shown me that he loves me in the bliss of time, but it wasn't enough. It's like he made me feel accustomed but he would leave me again eventually.
Hindi ko na alam kung masasanay na lang ba ako. Paniniwalain ko na lang siguro ang sarili ko na masyado akong mahirap mahalin kaya ako laging iniiwanan. O madali along mahalin kaya madali ring kalimutan.
"Kumusta na kaya si Sir Theo, 'no?" Angieline interrupted my thoughts.
We were having lunch together. Katatapos lamang namin sa isang meeting with Madam Cresencia sa kanyang kompanya, ang Grand Coast. It's a subsidiary company of High Coast which was run by the top-ranked shareholder of the company after Gregorio Madrigal died. After three years, Madam Cresencia built her own company.
We were chosen to work as her marketing officers on Grand Coast. It was a privilege to work for her again. She personally called me after the day I got fired, she told me that she would reserve me a job in her company. Finally, it came true. Parang kailan lang disappointed ako dahil hindi ako bumalik sa High Coast, ngayon mayroon na akong permanent job.
"Nako, dearest...I'm sure may asawa na 'yon at mga anak. 'Di ba, Yana?" Vince urged.
I smiled bitterly and drank my mango shake.
Hindi na nga ako nagsalita, isinama pa rin nila ako sa usapan. Tumingin ako sa kanilang dalawa. Tumayo ako ng tuwid at saka tumango.
"Oo naman. Sure ako may pamilya na siya ngayon," I bitterly responded.
Tatlong taon na rin naman ng nakalipas. I'm sure he won't keep his promise na babalik siya. He made me wait for five years back then, hindi na ako aasang babalik siya. My heart aches as I thought about him.
"Basta ako kay Joseph na ako," pagmamalaki ni Angieline.
I'm so happy for her when Joseph and Angieline became a couple. I was informed na mag-ex pala ang dalawa. Noong una, nahiya ako kay Angieline, Joseph had a thing for me back then. But past is past, they're married now and soon to give birth with their firstborn.
"Tse! Happy rin ako kay Raul, 'no!" maarteng pagmamalaki rin ni Vince.
Tumahimik na lang ako. I don't have anything to brag about. I've been a hopeless bachelorette for years. I have a couple of suitors, but I can't make myself feel something to them. It's because I know in myself, even I loathe that man, I will always wait for him.
"Yana, irereto ulit kita sa mga kaibigan ni Joseph, gusto mo ba?" she suggested.
I wiped my mouth with a tissue and shook my head.
"Hindi na kailangan, Angie. I promise."
"Hindi pwedeng walang makikinabang sa ganda mo, besh! Mas gumaganda ka kaya," Vince complimented.
I grinned and shook my head again. "Really, hindi ko talaga kailangan."
"Si Sir Theo pa rin ba?" they doubted.
I raised a brow and laughed.
"Alam ko na ang galawan na gan'yan, ha. Kitang-kita na mahal mo pa rin siya."
BINABASA MO ANG
To-get-her Again
Genç Kurgu(Book 2) As a newly hired Marketing employee of High Coast Corporation, Yana Bartolome has her wish granted: to be finally out in the world living a new normal life. After 5 years, she's determined to forget her past. Including Theo Salazar, the man...
