TATTOOED -h.s.

Chapter 32

"You don't have to leave." he desperately offers. His eyes wander around the room, trying to find or think of a legitimate reason to make me stay. It's heart wrenching because it wasn't long ago that all he'd have to do was flash a smile and I'd go running right back to him. But now he's not enough for me; and he knows that. "Please," he swallows. "Ju...just stay for a bit longer." His hands are shaking, and he's anxiously biting at his bottom lip like a child. If he had a teddy bear in hand, you'd mistaken him for a child on the verge of tears before bedtime. "I'm sorry." I mumble as the apartment seems to feel overwhelming and suffocating to me, there's too much pressure pushing down on me. I just want to get out. He's a nervous wreck and I feel like an awful person for abandoning him right now. "I don't want to stay." I admit. The words seem to burn as they fall from my lips. "I can walk you down." he offered. "I don't need you-" My sentence slipped out unfinished, breaking him before my eyes. I was going to tell him that his offer was unnecessary but the unfinished sentence was left hanging between us. If my heart wasn't already shattered, it would have broken with the devastating look he gives me. His eyes begin to water and his chest began to heave. "Please." he wheezes. I almost fall backwards into the hallway. The door slams shut and it's finally only me, but the guilt inside me continues to clutch at my throat. I need to get away from him because he's dragging me down to a place I'm desperately trying to claw out of.

Harry's P.O.V

Watching her walk out that door hurt worse than words could even explain. It was probably the worst pain I've ever felt, even being without her for months felt better than this does. I don't know whether to think I lost her or not, and I'm so scared for the day that I do and I so hope that day wasn't today. It is now about 5 in the morning and I'm worried about her getting home by herself, I don't know if it's a far walk from here or not, how do I know if she gets home safe or not? I even lost her number that day, I lost everything that day, especially the only thing I ever loved or cared for. What if she runs into Dean like she always does? I'm probably just over reacting, but I'm an overprotective dick and I'll admit that. I sat on the couch, just staring, trying to fight the urge to feed my bad, unhealthy habit. I'm trying so hard, but without Sarah what's the point anymore?

Sarah's P.O.V

Right when I entered the apartment, Courtney ran over to me and yelled in my face. "Where the hell have you been? I was about to go to the police for God's sake! Lauren came here freaking out wondering why you weren't texting her back, or me for that matter!" She shook me and then gestured to Lauren who was fast asleep on our couch. I tried to reply but the only thing I could get out was "I.." before I broke down in her arms sobbing. "What happened?" she said as I struggled to catch my breath. "Harry..." was all I could even attempt to say. "Oh babe, you have to let him go already. He's gone. I know it hurts, but it's been months and..." "He's alive." I cut her off and looked at her with my blurred vision. "I think you had a bit too many." she said as she wiped at my tears. "Courtney, I'm not drunk! I went to that fight! That asshole guy that was passing out those flyers lied, 'H.S.' didn't stand for Henry Stromberg...It was short for Harry Styles. Dean was fucking with me and long story short I was hidden under his desk and that's when Harry came, I freaked the fuck out, okay! After awhile I couldn't take it anymore and I ran out, he chased after me into the parking lot and then he took me to his new shitty ass apartment which literally looks like the building would turn to dust if there was a small gust of wind. His life has gone to shit, the poor guy lost everything, he literally only has his car, I mean it's a very expensive car and everything, but when that's all he has it's just heartbreaking. After he explained why he did it and what happened, I found needles..." I sobbed harder, as my voice scratched against my throat. "He's an addict again, I left but then I realized I forgot my purse, and when I went back he was having an asthma attack and I couldn't leave him so vulnerable like that and then we we're fine, but after a couple of minutes I couldn't handle even being in the same room as him. I don't know what came over me, but I left. I just fucking left him....Oh my God, why did I leave him? I'm such a bitch, I feel so bad, I promised him, I promised him I'd help him and I left. I know I should hate him, I just can't." I cried and she just stared at me in complete utter shock. "He...He's alive?" she stuttered. "I'm gonna fucking kill him!" Lauren ran over to us, she obviously heard everything without me realizing. "You won't even recognize him now, it's insane." I mumbled while staring down at my feet. "You guys had sex didn't you?" Courtney asked. "I mean duh, but that was before everything happened." I shrugged my shoulders. "After what happened? He made you think he was dead for months and you sat here depressed as shit?" she snapped as Lauren stood there not knowing who's side to choose. "He explained everything to me, he actually tried." "Obviously not hard enough." Courtney rolled her eyes. "He's your friend." I mumbled. "Why do you keep trying to protect him? All he's ever done is hurt you!" She yelled, causing Lauren to back away. "It's hard not to protect someone that you love with your whole heart...and you know what Courtney? You're wrong, you may only notice the pain he causes me but you've never seen the rest of it." I held back the tears as my eyes began to swell up once again. "Courtney, she's right," Lauren butted in. "He does really love her, I've seen it multiple times." Lauren continued, causing Courtney to glare at her for not backing her up.