Behind The Mask

Chapter 18

A/N: Sorry for the VERY long wait for this chapter. The pandemic kicked my mental ass a little bit making me not want to write. As you all know already, I usually write stuff that deals with serious emotional issues, and I was just dealing with enough emotional shit in real life. So I just needed to take a break for a moment there, but now I am back and you should know that I am almost done writing Chapter 19 already. Sorry that this chapter is a little bit shorter than usual, but it is partly because the next chapter will be much longer than usual. 

"I want to get out of this town," I tell E.J. as soon as I am sure he's awake.

I have probably been awake for two whole hours, wanting to leave this town, see my grandmother, and then head back to somewhere warmer. I've had enough of this cold, irritating drag queens calling me handsome, and this entire confusing thing with E.J. to boot. I just want to leave now.

"Why?" E.J. asks as he rubs the sleep from his eyes. His hair is standing everywhere making him look extremely cute, but I try to ignore that fact completely.

"Because I just want to. I want to find my grandmother, and then I need to get out of here. I don't like this state. I'd rather take my chances in New York. I still owe you a concert or a show remember," I answer, not wanting to tell E.J. what is really going through my mind.

"Well... Can I just wake up before we talk about this?" E.J. says as he gets up out of bed making his way to the bathroom. When he reaches it he turns around. "I really think we should talk about this a little bit. I'm not ready to go back to New York. And it's Christmas tomorrow. I'd like to not be on a bus on Christmas."

"Just get dressed," I answer, thinking about throwing on yet another hoodie over everything I already have on. I'm beginning to feel like a stuffed fat guy at this point, but after last night I will do anything to keep the cold away.

"Okay. Meet you downstairs for breakfast?" E.J. asks to which I nod. I am a bit hungry, and now that he has mentioned breakfast my stomach is making sure that it's exactly what I need.

I watch as E.J. disappears into the bathroom to get ready before I leave the room, taking the creaking steps down the hallway and down the stairs to where I know breakfast will probably be ready.

"Good morning handsome!" Cameron exclaims as I enter the dining room, where the table is covered in toast, fruits, jams, teas, and every other type of cereal imaginable.

I grab a box of Cheerios and fill a bowl, pouring milk over and plopping two pieces of buttered toast on top of it before I sit down and acknowledge Cameron.

"Look Cameron. We're not friends," I say without looking up from my bowl. "I'm just a guy on a road trip with his best friend. I'm not looking to complicate my life."

"Now aren't we touchy," Cameron whispers loud enough for me to hear. "Listen big boy..."

He waits until I look up from my breakfast, catching my eyes with his, locking them there, making me see the lips I kissed last night in a weak and lonely moment.

"You have a beautiful but broken boy upstairs who loves you to hell and back. He knows about your plans on ending your life at the end of this trip, and still he is there for you. But who knows for how long? It's one thing standing by a friend who doesn't have a choice in dying. It is another thing completely when the person you love is choosing to go and wanting to leave you behind. You might need some friends to the end, because if I was E.J. I would have left a long time ago and kicked you under the ass," Cameron says more serious than what I have ever seen him. No theatrics. No drama. Just a boy sitting across from me telling me what he actually thinks of my entire situation.