Praying Under Pressure

40 - Worshipped, Admired: Thankful

"I hate school!" 

Ward then proceeds to bang his forehead on the table in the school library. Elliot only sighs softly, knowing the more he tries to reprimand his study date the more childish he will become. 

School fucking sucks. It always had for Warren and it continues to suck for Ward. Every person in his life used to scream at him for his grades or his behavior or some shit related to school. But his life sucked enough that he couldn't give a flying fuck if he passed a test or got sent to the principle's office. 

He didn't care about graduating when he moved to San Diego. He didn't have Jace -the only person who had mattered even in a small way- to get him focused on studies. He didn't care about his future or his past or his present. Only about how to feel good.

He got his GED through a program at the community college at the guilt of fucking over Aunt Kathy's life. School in exchange for somewhere to stay and food in his stomach.

He entered community college to look good. Now he was forced to have a future again. He had friends, he had relatives, he had to keep going. Lord knows Ward is aware of how cruel the world can be if you don't look good. 

So now he's getting a degree in fine arts like that will take him anywhere. He pretends to study, wings most tests, and loves pretending to listen to lectures. If the world viewed him the way he wanted them to he would have never gone to college and instead spent the money on an internship for a tattoo artist. 

The world doesn't work that way, however, so now he is being forced by his person to study like he wants to pass. 

After their first date, Elliot decided that he would go the traditional way: after date three you can be boyfriends. While Ward had already begun thinking of Elliot as his boyfriend in his head. But if he was ever going to get a boyfriend, he had to do it Elliot's way.

"How long have we been at this?" He picks up his phone from where Elliot placed it when he stole it. 4:45. Only an hour. Or, maybe a lifetime.

Elliot chuckles under his breath, eyes narrowed at the textbook as he copies a condensed version, "You're making it a lot longer."

"Babe," Ward isn't looking at his partner either. Instead updating himself on the Instagram posts of the past 30 minutes -when he last checked it. His textbook and notebook disagreed, "I warned you. Education and preparation are not my things. Unless I'm prepping you, however." 

They both look up at the same time. Elliot scowls, a faint blush on his cheeks, Ward winks.

Elliot rolls his eyes, glancing around him at the other tables. Most have headphones in -also something they tried but then Ward just spent 15 minutes 'looking for music'. (Looking through twitter). 

"We're in a library, Ward. If we were to talk or say inappropriate things, we would have studied at one of our houses. Or even Alaskas," Ward smiles at the idea of Alaskas. Food would make this all ten times better, "But studying is better to talk until you need to review. So, pretend to do that for 30 more minutes and we'll go get dinner. Yeah?"

Ward's shoulders slouch. 30 minutes could be so long. Especially when you're surrounded by books and words and stuck up people and Elliot. 

Elliot was distracting. Made Ward just want to jump up and pin the man to his seat the way Elliot chewed on his lower lip. He also liked the way Elliot got a crease between his eyebrows while he furiously wrote in his notebook. Along with man's absent habit of brushing the few curls that may tickle his forehead. 

Elliot was studying. He had never been one to wing tests or hope he knew the right answers. It just wasn't how he was raised. He was raised on strict grades. Strict schooling. So studying in the library on a Sunday night was just how his world revolved.