I find it sorta weird that I feel as if fitting society's beauty standards would make me feel better.
Like maybe if I was skinnier, had clearer skin, thinner thighs, smaller feet, then maybe I would actually be likeable.
Maybe if my wrist and thighs weren't scared, and maybe if I didn't have all my obnoxiously large scars everywhere on my body.
And of course, most of the time, people that are deemed pretty are also white. And I'm far from that.
Idk why I think that would make me hate myself less, it wouldn't. I would just have fewer things to hate. Scratch that, I'd probably still hate my body.
Well, aside from being overly self conscious, I guess that fact that I want to not alive is also a problem.
Well, I'm gonna go cry myself to sleep and then wake up pretending everything's okay. Yeet
