Reasons To Live✔

04

The weekend is the only time I get a rest. Me and Josh were texting all of last night after he left to spend time with his girlfriend. He told me all about his first dates with Sophie and all their current dates.

The next day, he comes over. We meet on my brick wall where my parents can't see us. He isn't even late this time.

I sit on the wall, watching the occasional cars speed down the quiet road. I hold my small bag close to my chest and soon Josh walks around the corner and pushes himself up to sit next to me.

"I got you some lemonade." I say as I search through my bag for the can and handing it to him. He smiles a bright smile at me.

"Thankyou. I've had a bad day. Can we walk?" He asks, jumping down and once again offering me his hand. I shake my head to it and start following him.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Not really," he mumbles. "How has your day been?"

"It's been okay, just boring." I hum as we walk down the quiet road. "Where are we going?" I ask as we walk down a very tiny wooden path towards a full line of trees.

"Just away from here, somewhere we won't be seen." His hands are in his pockets as I follow behind him, the longer stands of grass tickling my legs.

Soon after we reach a small hill, surrounded by trees on one side and a clear view of the beach. I sit down next to him and he places the can of lemonade next to him. I lean back in to my arms and stare up at clouds. I hear rustling as he lies next to me too, also staring at the sky. His curly hair falls back into the sand and his eyes look sadder today.

"I like feeling like I'm on the only person in the world," he whispers, his head turning to face me.

"Me too. Although I wouldn't mind company but honestly relationships are bullshit," I laugh, and turn to face him too.

"You really think?"

"Well, I like the idea of a soulmate but it's just knowing which person is your soulmate and which person isn't. I wish it was like one of those POV TikTok videos where it's like 'the first words your soulmate says to you are on your wrist', it'd be so much easier," I ramble on as he stares at me and I stare at the sky.

"That takes the fun out of it. Plus the idea of soulmates it just a mindset."

"What do you mean?" I ask, turning to face him again. His blue eyes gaze back at me.

"A soulmate isn't scientifically proven. It's just people thinking 'is this person good enough for me?' Or 'does it get better than this?' It's just a bad mindset of you hoping for better until you find better and they conveniently do too. There's nothing to it. It's just not love if you're thinking like that. Soulmates is more of what people think to give themself relief," he confidently says, his voice clear and not stumbling. "You're not destined to meet someone and there's gonna be millions of people you could be with. It's up to you to make it happen," he finishes, letting out a sigh of relief.

"Nerd." I mumble under my breath. He quickly whips his head round to see me, sitting up and staring down at me. For a moment I think he's annoyed until he starts laughing.

"Do you not think the popular guy can be smart and have opinions?" He sticks his tongue out at me before turning back to look at the beach.

"I think it's cool. There's more depth to you now." I whisper, watching the clouds move again. "Do you believe in love?"

"If someone doesn't then that's weird. Of course love exists. In many forms too like family and relationships."

"Do you love Sophie?"

He glances down at the sand before looking back up. "She says it to me all the time but I'm not there yet. She thinks we're soulmates but you know what I think about that now. 7 months of knowing her and not saying it to her, she must think I'm insane." He laughs, an awkward laugh. "Whenever I go to say it, I just can't because I don't want to lie to her. It's complicated." He continues.

"Sounds it." I say, sitting up next to him.

"I just- yeah. I don't know yet. She shouted at me last night for talking to you." He laughs, a forced laugh this time.

I feel my heart drop as I force a laugh too. It aches for a few moments.

"Anyway," he takes a sip from his lemonade before continuing.

"Number four: soulmates."

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Dedication: VarchasianKookie we don't know each other very well but thankyou so much for all the support on this book! I appreciate it so much and it means so much to me that you'd read and interact with my book! ♡♡ P.S. I also love your book.