Reasons To Live✔

08

We walk through the park together, the quieter side. We aren't talking and it's peaceful, his hands are shoved into his jean pockets and his eyes are rapidly moving around to the flowers and to the trees. I used to walk here every week, alone. Then one day I lost motivation and now I'm barely at this park.

"I'll walk you home," he says out of the blue. I turn to him and smile. He's staring at the dirt path. He holds the gate open for me and we start walking down the various quiet paths together. He doesn't say much, his eyes just wondering around the area and he's fiddling with his hoodie strings.

"Is everything okay?" I turn my head to face him.

"Yeah, don't worry." He hums, his hands moving to his hoodie pockets instead.

"You sure?" I follow-up.

"Mhm. Don't worry, Elyse." He says back as we reach the street I live on. I nod slowly, my eyes moving to the floor too. The 2 minute journey down my road is silent. Completely silent.

He walks me to the drive way, his hands shoved into his pockets and his hair falling over his eyes as he kicks the floor.

"Are you sure you're good?" I ask again, my eyebrows furrowed together.

"Yeah, I'll text you." That's all he says as he turns around and hurries down the road. I stand there for a moment, listening to his footsteps fading before walking into my house.

I hurry up the stairs after waving to my preoccupied parents. I fling my bag to the side and pull my phone out my back pocket. I scroll down to Josh's contact and quickly type a message.

Elyse
5:32PM
I really enjoy spending time with you but are you doing okay? Something seemed off with you, I don't want to pry to much but I care about you.

I gaze down at the screen for a second before deleting the message and trying again, letting out an exaggerated sigh.

Elyse
5:33PM
Are you okay? You seemed quiet today. I hope everything is okay.

Without thinking twice I hit send and sit myself down on my desk chair. I spin myself around to the window, staring forward at the trees waving across the street. I smile to myself, the soft music from the radio downstairs echoing to me upstairs.

That is until I hear my phone beep from the other side of the desk, the screen lights up; showing a new message. I reach over and instinctively smile at it.

Josh
5:43PM
Can I call you?

Elyse
5:44PM
Yeah, of course.

A few moments later his contact fills the screen, without hesitation I answer and place the phone next to my hear.

"Hey," I hear his soft voice say.

I smile.

"Hey, are you gonna tell me what's wrong?"

He lets out a soft laugh. "Don't worry about it, I promise it's fine."

"If you're sure, I won't question you anymore. Anyway, any reason you want to call?" I say, spinning around on my chair again.

"Is just wanting to talk to you not a good enough reason?" He chuckles.

"Well, I feel honoured if that's the case," I hum back.

"That brings us onto our next topic," he says, I hear some noises and talking.

"Does it?"

"Yep. You ready?" He asks.

"Wow me."

"So we're in Spring, so everything is blossoming. You saw those flowers, right? The range of colours from yellow to purple," he starts.

I think back to the park, the green bushes patterned with different coloured flowers and all those shades. The sun was beating down onto them, they stood out a lot. They outline the fences perfectly, and the paths.

"Of course, the only nice thing about that park," I laugh.

"Now the contrast to Winter or Autumn and how everything changes dramatically."

"You are being incredibly poetic tonight, is this about to get symbolic?" I joke.

"For sure, are you ready?"

I nod, even though he can't see it. "Go for it."

"In Winter there are no leaves on those giant trees we stand under, no colourful flowers, no sun shining down yet it's a very beautiful season. Do you see where I'm going?"

"No, want to explain?"

"Everything changes a lot when seasons change but it's still beautiful. Even when there are no flowers or sunshine- I still think it's an amazing season and I wish everyone else would see that too because the way Spring makes me feel can't even compare to anything Winter could make me feel. Although Spring is great, Winter deserves better and I can only hope one day Winter will get better. Winter is amazing, even though it's completely different to Spring but everything is always changing, in every aspect." His soft voice trails off towards the end. I feel my heart slow down, everything else in the world going silent as I think about his words.

"Are you-" I start.

"Whatever you're thinking. Yes. I am." He whispers back after interrupting me. "I don't need to say it."

Is he comparing me to Winter?

"Josh, what's going on?" I say. I hear him breathing softly before sighing.

"I can't talk about it, I have to go."

What is happening right now?

"Josh-" I'm interrupted again. He says one more thing before the line goes dead.

"Number eight: everything is constantly changing."

---

Dedication: GNK_01 you sent me a really nice message and it meant a lot to me and it made my month, honestly! We had a brief conversation but I hope you know you're an amazing person! Lots of love and I hope you're doing okay. (P.S I'm here if you ever need me). ♡