No Going Back

19

Energy may be likened to the bending of a crossbow; decision, to the releasing of a trigger.
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The Art of War
Sun Tzu

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There was a crackling energy in the air, a thick sort of tension that made the small office feel suffocating.

Judging by the thinly veiled irritation rolling off of Min Yoongi, the following conversation probably would not be a pleasant one. The elder's eyebrows were set low over simmering eyes, his mouth drawn into a tight line. He leaned back in his chair, one leg crossed over a knee, all while he drummed his fingers against the wooden desk. The persistent rhythm was the only sound that punctuated the otherwise silent room.

And based on the sharp exhales that occasionally left the Chief's mouth, he was clearly doing his best to find a resolution to this entire situation . . . The mess Taehyung inadvertently created.

Taehyung knew he had to speak, to offer up more explanations as to why he did the things he did; the lying, protecting his imposter. But he worried that his words would put him in a more precarious position - would put Jungkook in a more dangerous place. He had to think strategically, to make the best case for himself as possible. If he could find the words to explain why he didn't share his true identity sooner, or why he let Jungkook get away with everything for as long as he had, maybe the Chief would take pity on him.

Maybe the Chief would take pity on Jungkook, too.

In his heart and bones, Taehyung knew the logical move was to send Jungkook away. Having the younger stay here - stay with Taehyung - would most likely introduce more trouble. And in this uncertain environment, where gunmen actively hunted him down, someone was bound to get hurt. It would be safer for everyone to return Jungkook to his rightful home, to keep him away from the shitshow that was Taehyung's life.

But - and this was the stupid part - Taehyung didn't know how to say goodbye to the younger. He didn't want to know how. He was so sick and tired of people leaving, and for once, he wanted to be greedy. He wanted to only think of his needs; he wanted Jungkook to stay.

With him.

Here.

Having that desire made him feel like shit. How could he be so selfish, putting his wants above someone else's safety? How could he knowingly put a person in danger like that? If he genuinely cared for Jungkook, wasn't he supposed to set him free?

But Taehyung didn't want to be alone anymore. All his adult life - ever since his father became the CEO - he felt lonely, even though hordes of glamorous and influential people constantly surrounded him. But none of those people truly cared about him; they only stuck around because of his family's prestige. The only reason he had Namjoon, even, was because he worked for Taehyung's father. So he always held onto the secret wish of being valued for who he was, rather than because of who he shared bloodlines with.

And it somehow seemed, amid all this chaos and disorder, he managed to find someone who actually did want to get to know him.

Taehyung found Jungkook.

Fuck. One would think he'd be elated, thrilled to find a person who saw him and not his family name. But this was not the time or place. These weren't the right circumstances.

Sitting here across from the Chief would be so much easier if Taehyung felt nothing for the boy. If he only had to answer for his actions, he probably wouldn't be worried at all. He'd be indifferent to Yoongi's decision on what to do with Jungkook; he'd obey any orders given.