july 17, 2020, 10:28pm to 10:40pm.
my mind is messy
i can't breathe
there's not enough oxygen left for me
i'm slowly fading, or is it quickly?
i can't tell, time escapes me
i'm in a rush, no internal trust,
no more little me playing double dutch,
my lungs are collapsing, breathing raspy,
my throat closes up, there's no hope for us
i can't escape, i won't escape, i can't escape
get out, stay in, get out! stay in! GET OUT! STAY IN!
i can't breathe.
my mind is messy like a kitchen,
but no sweets are baked, just thoughts of killing,
there's a knife.
i can't breathe,
my mind is messy,
it's like scribbles on a once blank page,
a hand blinded by rage,
it's an outrage.
it goes with age,
the mess continues, it doesn't leave, only pretends to,
i can't see,
i can't hear,
there's no taste when you're numb,
i can't smell,
i can't touch,
there's no connection when you're on the run,
i can't breathe.
my people have been under attack
but i'm too gone, i want to be gone.
how can i even think that when
i'm still here and they're not,
gone too soon, wisps on the wind,
names whispered, shouted from a million splendid tongues,
will i be one?
life's not fun.
they say it's only just begun,
but it's been on since my birth,
i came out choking, what a curse,
yet i survived, here i am,
another grain stuck in the sand,
a piece of glass shattered from the rest,
forgotten, by her lonesome, i don't mind,
yes i do, i'm okay, no i'm not, i have friends, where they at,
happiness exists, i don't feel that, i didn't eat, you're getting fat,
why do you look like that, i hate mirrors, no!- no pictures
what is rest? why can't i sleep? why won't he understand?
why do i try, why doesn't he try, because he's a man,
ha, so grand
i can't stand.
i can't sit, i can't walk, i'm hunched over, i feel i'll flop
i've never passed out, by why not, i haven't got shot
why am i here, i can't take it, these thoughts in my mind,
they swarm so loud, they drown me out, or is it all me
my voice is quiet, apparently i'm mumbling,
i can't see. i can't breathe.
clouds against my eyes express my misery,
i'm tired, why fight, just lose, no more plight,
no abuse, no lack of understanding, just nothing,
be no more, fade into the earth, sink to its core,
be no more.
i'm not worth much more.
YOU ARE READING
Mind {Prose Vol. 2}✔
Poesia❝In my mind, there is pain. I am exhausted. I feel defeat from my hair tips to my feet- my body feels the stress weighing down on my shoulders. I try and try every day, but nothing seems to go my way. In my mind, there is pain, yet I try because one...
